


Screaming at the Sun

by bumbleflight



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: F/M, Trans, girl!Gerard, i like summer camps lol, idk i wrote this awhile back, they're at a summer camp
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2020-07-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:53:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 21,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25479487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bumbleflight/pseuds/bumbleflight
Summary: Frank hadn't considered having help on his new music, especially not from a girl.
Relationships: Frank Iero/Gerard Way
Comments: 13
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> transphobia tw for the whole fic.

Frank lay in bed, pillow over his head as he tried not to scream.

Crying was probably more appropriate in this situation, but Frank didn't feel like he could cry. He couldn't even say he'd lied to, because technically no one had ever said anything but the truth.

Frank cursed at himself repeatedly for not putting the pieces together on his own. How had he not figured it out?

None of this was real. None of it fucking existed.

It had all started on the first day of camp.

Frank hadn't planned on spending his whole summer at camp – he hadn't really wanted to either – but when the only other option was staying at a Ronald McDonald house with his mom until his boarding school began in the fall, he jumped at the chance of doing anything else. That ended up being his grandfather's summer camp: House of Blues.

Blues ran in Frank's family. His great-grandfather had played, his grandfather had played, and Frank's own father had played until he overdosed when Frank was four months old.

Frank's mother had remarried to a carpenter quickly after that, only to discover she couldn't have more children. Frank thought he had dodged a bullet there, until his stepfather's seventeen-year-old cousin got pregnant, and gave them the baby.

Just Frank's luck: That baby wound up being the most medically cursed child the family could imagine. They named him Patrick, and he had a shit ton of mucus in his lungs that caused him to stay in critical condition for the majority of his life.

Or as the doctor's called it: Cystic Fibrosis.

Thankfully Frank's stepfather had been loaded, and was able to afford all of Patrick's treatments. Frank had grown up spending most of his time on his guitar, learning to write his own music, and skateboarding through the halls of the many Ron Don houses they stayed at over the years. That was, until the scaffolding under his feet broke one morning and dropped his stepfather four stories down to his death.

Life insurance and inheritance could only take them so far, and it wasn't long until they'd been back where they started: poor and fatherless. An uncle on his stepfather's side had taken pity on Frank, and sent him to an expensive boarding school in Pennsylvania. Until then, though, Frank had the whole summer to waste.

"Fuck!" Frank cried as his skateboard landed on its side, skidding to a halt and sending him flying off. He stumbled for a few steps before catching himself on the side of the drained pool and steadying himself. "Son of a bitch." Frank huffed as he caught his breath, kicking his skateboard right side up. He placed one foot on the board, preparing to kick it forward when his phone chirped, making his hesitate.

He pulled it out, glancing at the contact before answering. "Hey," Frank said, putting it on speaker. "Frank!" Grandpa's voice drifted through the phone, friendly but urgent. "Where are you? Doors open in an hour, and you're supposed to perform at the welcoming speech! We need to start sound check." Frank's grandfather was named Frank Iero – same as Frank's father and same as Frank – but he was referred to as Grandpa by everyone.

"Heading there now." Frank said, clicking off his phone before Grandpa could continue. He was going to be late, and Grandpa was going to be disappointed per usual. Frank had been watching the camp since the start of summer, but this was the final week, so he'd decided to participate.

Unfortunately, Grandpa had seen it as a business opportunity, and when the news got out that Frank Iero would be in the camp, it sold out without hours.

That was the other thing: Frank was famous.

Turns out people had liked those songs he'd written at the hospital. The small label he'd signed to – four years ago on his twelfth birthday – soon sold him to a major one, kick-starting Frank into his music career.

The major label wanted quiet songs – and only quiet songs – so that's what Frank wrote. It wasn't his style, but it's what the industry liked. Once, Frank had shown them a heavier song he had written. He thought it was quite good with its harsh-toned guitar and screaming vocals, but the label had hated it with a passion. They threatened to end the contract, which wouldn't have been a problem, except for the fact that it was supporting almost all of Patrick's treatment.

And that was all that really mattered, in Frank's opinion. Not that Frank was the sentimental type, but he knew it should have been his brother here, not him. Patrick would have loved this camp, far more than Frank ever could have.

Frank pulled out his phone, texting Patrick.

F: Camp's starting soon, and I have to perform blegh

The three dots appeared almost instantly, before showing, Patrick's reply.

P: Being popular must be sooo hardd. Poor you.

Frank laughed, shaking his head. Patrick was so weird.

F: yeah, whatever

Frank shoved his phone back in his pocket as he reached camp, walking out of the woods and down to the front desk.

"Frank!" Brian called, brightening as he saw the boy. "Where the Hell'd you wander off to this time?"

"The drained pool," Frank shrugged, motioning to the skateboard under his arm. "It's the only flat place within a couple miles."

"You're lucky Grandpa loves you." Brian said. "Being two hours late? On opening day?"

"It's the camp's last week of the summer." Frank defended himself. "And he doesn't love me, he loves my fame."

"Don't say that." Brian warned, but Frank brushed it off. "I'm going down to the stage." He turned, walking down the stairs to the back entrance. The front doors of the stage were outside, but Frank avoided using them if he could.

Frank walked down the black and dusty stairs, his feet knocking against the hard floor. The weak yellow light from the ceiling reflected off the shiny posters on the wall, and Frank ran his fingers subconsciously over one as he passed.

"Frank!" Grandpa called, and Frank put his hand up in greeting, rolling his skateboard under the stage for later retrieval. "Hey."

"Go get your guitar, and let's start sound check!"

✰✰✰

Frank slipped a necklace off, over his head, tossing it back and forth between his hands as he waited backstage. He could hear the chatter of a couple hundred kids as they sat down, and he sighed, bored. Frank's feet swung beneath him and he tapped the toes of his Vans on the floor impatiently.

His phone let off a buzz, and he glanced at it with interest. Mom.

"Hello?" Frank asked, and his mom's worried voice responded. "How are you, Frank?"

"Good," Frank said quickly. "What's going on?"

A pause. "It's Patrick. His team wants to start him on new medicine, and – "

"Do you need money, mom?" Frank cut her off. "You can just ask me directly, alright? It's not embarrassing."

"Frank, it's . . . complicated." His mother said quietly. "The medicine – it's urgent. Patrick needs it very badly."

Frank frowned. "I'll ask James if I can get paid earlier this week." He said, practically hearing his mother's relief. He'd told her over and over that she could ask Frank's agent herself, but her pride was too high. "Thank you, Frank. You know how sorry I am to ask,"

"Don't be, really." Frank said exasperatedly, changing the subject. "How's Patrick?"

"He's right here." Frank's mom said, and there was a small rustling on the other end before Patrick's voice came through, excited and joyful. "Frank!"

"How's it going?" Frank asked, and Patrick laughed. "So good," He said, pausing as he was hit by a coughing fit. "We played Bingo the other night and I crushed everyone's ass!"

"Patrick," Frank heard his mother's muffled warning and Patrick's "Sorry," before he continued, his voice lower. "And then Andy and I snuck into the lobby and put fake spiders in the coffee machine!"

"You did not!" Frank grinned, and Patrick giggled. "We got in so much trouble, but it was so worth it!"

"I'm sure it was," Frank said, studying his worn down shoes. Patrick should be here, having fun at camp, not a hospital.

"Aww, I have to go," Patrick said, and Frank nodded. "Alright, bye. Talk to you soon."

"Bye!"

Grandpa walked by Frank, patting him on the shoulder. "You're on in fifteen," He said, before walking up the stairs to the stage. Frank could hear Grandpa's voice through the speakers, loud and welcoming to all the campers. For a moment he let himself wonder what it would be like to be out there, in the crowd like everyone else, but quickly squashed the thought. Patrick's treatment cost money, and Frank only knew one way to get it.

"James?" Frank dialed up his agent, letting the phone ring for a few minutes before giving up and pulling up his messages. He decided to type out a text instead; James could read it whenever he came back.

F: Hey – Can I get my check earlier this week? It's important, reply when you can.

"Welcome to House of Blues!" The sound of Grandpa's voice reverberated through the stage, down into the changing room where Frank was sitting. "Who's excited for camp?"

Frank's phone buzzed and he glanced down at it, surprised to see James' number. "Hey, what's up?"

"Jumping the gun, are we now, Frank?" James asked amicably, and Frank gave a tight-lipped smile. "I need the money for Patrick."

"Yeah, yeah, I know." James waved him off. "But I'm not made of money, and neither is your label. I can talk to them, but I think the best you're gonna get is from a new single."

"A new single?" Frank repeated. "But James, Patrick needs it sooner than that!"

"I don't know what to say," James replied. "It's the best deal I can offer at the moment."

"You know where I am, James," Frank sighed. "How am I supposed to record?"

"You're shitting me, right?" James laughed. "Frank, you're at a top ranked music camp! There are at least four studios there, if not more."

"You want me to record myself?" Frank repeated, confused. He hadn't mixed his own tracks since he was thirteen.

"It's not like you don't know how." James said, before adding, "Look, I got a call."

"Okay, okay," Frank said, before hanging up. He needed the money as soon as possible, so he better start writing.

"Frank! You ready to go?" Brian pushed his shoulder from behind and Frank jumped, not knowing he was there. "Yep," Frank nodded, jumping to his feet and jogging up the stairs. Grandpa was already waiting for him, and he smiled as Frank ran out on stage. The crowd cheered.

"As you all know, this is my grandson, Frank Iero." Grandpa introduced proudly. Frank leaned toward the microphone. "How are we doing today?" He asked brightly, grinning at the people in front of him. He talked for a minute or two about how happy he was to be at camp – all of it faked, though, as his thoughts were on Patrick – before stepping away from the mic and pulling it down.

Sitting down on a stool, Frank grabbed his guitar from the stand, plugging in a cable and fiddling with the tuning for a moment. As he pulled the microphone down to his face, the crowd grew quiet, and Frank glanced up at them.

It was hard to see anything through the blinding spotlights Grandpa had insisted on putting on the indoor stage, but Frank could just make out the outlines of teenagers, watching in anticipation. He swallowed, playing a few experimental power chords before closing his eyes and launching into the intro of one of his more recent songs.

The heat from the light burned his face as he played, starting quietly as usual. After a moment his thoughts drifted back to Patrick. He needed this single done, and he needed it done soon.

Frank was unaware of how worked up he was getting until he found himself slashing at the guitar, his voice raised to a shout. He finished strongly, taking a large sip of water as he hung his guitar back in the stand and stalked off stage.

"What happened up there?" Brian asked, meeting him as he stepped off.

"What are you talking about?" Frank replied. Sweat was dripping off his face, and he wiped at it with the neck of his shirt. Brian's eyes widened. "I don't know, you seemed kind of angry."

"Yeah?" Frank snapped, suddenly irritated. "Well, maybe I am."

"If I didn't know better I'd say you were on your period," Brian teased. "C'mon, Frank. Lighten up."

"Patrick's sick," Frank said, and Brian shrugged. "Isn't he always? Put on a happy face, Frank. No one wants to see you sad."

"I'm allowed to be sad!" Frank yelled, squeezing his eyes shut. "My brother could die at any moment!" The words hit him hard and Frank gasped, swallowing another shout.

"Frank, come on," Brian started, but Frank was already storming out the door, letting the screen slam shut behind him.

Frank was mad. Seething, actually.

He got into these funks often, where his mind seemed to overflow with rage, and nothing could calm him down. Frank tried to think about what his therapist had taught him – smell the roses, blow the candles – but Frank didn't think deep breathing was going to help him now.

Frank wanted to hit something, anything. He was running now, through the woods. He didn't realize where he was going until he broke into a clearing, finding himself back at the drained pool.

He huffed, kicking a rock angrily. It bounced a few feet before coming to a stop. Growling, Frank sat down, breathing heavily. Jesus Christ, he needed to calm down.

"Where's the bear?"

Frank's head snapped up, looking around until he saw the source of the voice. There was a girl sitting a fair distance away, her bright eyes glimmering with amusement.

"What?" Frank asked breathily, feeling the anger draining from him already as the girl laughed. "The bear." She repeated. "You were running to hard for there not to be one."

"Oh," Frank chuckled, rubbing a hand over his face. "Very funny." He waited for the girl to squeal as she realized who he was, but when a few moments passed and nothing happened, he hauled himself to his feet, walking over to where she sat. "Well, we should get over with it, already." He said. "You want my signature?"

"No?" The girl frowned, looking up at him. "Why, should I? Are you famous, or something?"

Frank opened his mouth to say yes, but stopped himself. Here was a girl who was both incredibly cute, and had no clue who he was. Frank supposed once she realized who he was that would change, but he didn't see the harm in prolonging it as long as he could.

"Nope," Frank shrugged, sitting down a comfortable distance away from her.

"Gee Way," The girl stuck out her hand, and Frank took it. "Frank Iero." Frank regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth, bracing himself. But the girl just tilted her head at him. "You know, you're acting really weird." She pointed out. "I'm really sorry if you're someone famous. I've been in Argentina for the past three years, so I'd totally have no idea who you were. If you were famous," She added humorously. "Which you said you were not."

"Argentina?" Frank asked, looking the girl up and down. She had short white-ish hair that went down to her shoulders, and a faint goth aesthetic that Frank had never seen in any other girl at camp. "Is everyone there are hot as you?"

"You're hilarious," The girl said sarcastically, and Frank grinned. "Say something in Spanish."

"Que te folla una pez," She laughed, cracking up at herself.

"What does that mean?" Frank asked, and Gee's face flushed a little as she stumbled around her words, obviously unprepared for the question. "Uh, nice to meet you."

"Gee, even I know that wasn't nice to meet you." Frank replied, and Gee kicked his foot playfully, giggling a "Fuck you," before asking. "So, Frank, what brings you here?"

"To the pool?" Frank asked. "Well, I've been here the whole summer, so I come down here a lot."

"The whole summer?" Gee's eyes widened. "Wow, you must really like blues."

"Actually, I'm more of a rock-and–roll type of guy." Frank smirked. "Surprising, right? My grandfather owns the camp, but things just get to be a lot sometimes, you know?"

"I know." Gee nodded. "What happened? I mean, you totally don't have to tell me, but I kind of expect you to at this point."

So, Frank told her about Patrick, and James, and how he needed a new song if he wanted to help his brother. He wasn't entirely sure why he was doing it, but it just felt right.

"It's going to be a rock song, right?" Gee asked, but Frank shook his head. "No, my label usually likes indie or blues."

"Well, they're your label," Gee said. "You should write what makes you happy."

"I wish it worked like that," Frank said wistfully, and Gee pushed his shoulder. Frank noticed her nails were black and shiny as she drew her hands back. "I hope your brother's okay." She added after a moment. "It's really cool that you do this for him."

Frank shrugged. "It's not like that, it's just –" He was cut off as his phone began to ring. Cursing internally, Frank pulled it out.

"Frank!" Brian called. "Granpa's looking for you. Where'd you go?"

"I'm coming, I'm coming," Frank grumbled, hanging up. "Sorry," He apologized to Gee as he stood up.

"Someone cares about you a lot," Gee smiled, but Frank shook his head. Sometimes he wished they didn't. "Hey, can I get your number?" Frank asked hesitantly. He wasn't sure what it was about this girl that made him so nervous – it was quite the rarity to see him giving such a fuck.

Gee raised a brow, motioning for Frank to give her his phone. She put in her contact before tossing it back. "Thanks," Frank breathed, before taking a step back toward camp. "See you around?"

Gee nodded and Frank turned and ran off, his heart beating a little quicker than normal.


	2. Chapter 2

Frank sat back on his bed, pillow propped under his head as he looked at his phone. His bunkmates were still unpacking, but having moved into this cabin three days ago, Frank didn't have much unpacking to do.

The cabins housed six people, but were split in half, connected by the bathrooms. He hadn't met the people on the other side yet, but the people on his side seemed ok. There was Ray, a seemingly calm guy, and then . . .

"What's your name again?" Frank waved a hand at the other boy, making him sit up. "Ryan," He said quickly, and Frank nodded. "Cool."

"It's just so weird to be sharing a room with you," Ryan stammered. "'Cause like, you're Frank Iero. This is just crazy."

Frank smiled awkwardly, and Ray looked at Ryan, not unkindly. "Ryan," He said nicely, shooting a glance at Frank. "I'm going to speak on Frank's behalf, and say that this week will be a lot more fun if you just treat Frank like he's a normal guy, okay?"

Frank gave Ray a grateful smile, and Ray held two thumbs up.

"Right, right," Ryan yelped. "I'll definitely do that."

"Don't stress," Frank said plainly, turning his attention back down to his phone. His fingers lingered over Gee's contact, unsure if he should text her or not. Would he come off as desperate? After all, he'd see her tomorrow, wouldn't he? Maybe he should just wait until then.

Fuck it.

Frank clicked on the number, typing in a quick,

F: Hey

He waited a few moments before a notification came back.

G: who's this?

F: Frank

G: couldn't stay away from me, could you?

Frank laughed, shaking his head.

F: you gave me your number!!

G: you asked me for it

F: should I leave then?

G: nope

A pause.

G: how's the song going?

F: haven't started

G: need help??

Frank paused. He hadn't considered having help on the new single, much less from a girl.

F: yeah, where should we meet tomorrow?

G: you don't want to do it tonight?

Tonight?

F: meet at the pool?

G: be there in fifteen

Frank raised a brow. He'd never met someone quite like Gee before.

"Where are you heading to?" Ray asked as Frank got out of bed, walking toward the door.

"Going for a walk," Frank shrugged, and Ray gave him a face that seemed to say "at this hour?" but to Frank's relief, said nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was dedicated to someone idk who


	3. Chapter 3

Gee tapped her foot in anticipation as she waited by the empty pool for Frank. Her three roommates hadn't cared too much when she'd left without an explanation, but Gee suspected that none of them liked her very much, anyway.

That wasn't unusual for her: social anxiety and the overwhelming urge to push away anyone who tried to talk to her would usually do that. It wasn't that Gee didn't like people; she just couldn't risk anyone getting too close.

It was Gee's first time going somewhere as just Gee.

She had always been transgender Gee, or Gee who used to be Gerard, or Mikey's fag older brother, Gee. But never just as herself, and she couldn't risk fucking it up.

Which is why Gee was completely dumbfounded on the fact she was talking to this boy, Frank Iero. Frank thought she was a girl.

Gee frowned, correcting herself. She was a girl, but she was also a trans girl, and Frank didn't know that.

Which is probably the only reason he's still talking to you, Gee thought unhelpfully.

Frank was cute though, and he was funny, and he was completely and entirely the weirdest person ever. Gee was reminded of his music career, and she pulled out her phone, deciding to Google him.

Frank Iero.

The results came up immediately, showing photo after photo of his face. Frank with a guitar, Frank with some girls, Frank on stage. Gee clicked on the first link, his Instagram. She was immediately hit with Frank's massive amount of followers, and Gee blinked, confused. Eight-hundred thousand. Frank really was famous.

Why had he told Gee he wasn't?

She clicked on his highlights, watching his section for music. There were clips of Frank singing and performing, and Frank writing songs. They were all calm blues tunes until the very end. Frank looked much happier in this one as he hammered on his guitar, eyes closed as he sang loudly. It definitely wasn't blues.

Gee played it again, watching closer this time. It was only then that she heard the giggle in the background as the person filming laughed, and how Frank looked at them with so much joy.

"Don't laugh at me, Patr – " The video cut off.

I wonder if that's Patrick, Gee thought, reminded of Frank's brother. Step-brother? Gee wasn't sure.

Gee looked through Frank's Instagram, scrolling back to years prior, but couldn't find another mentioned of the boy. Strange.

"Stalking me, are you?"

Gee jumped, looking up to see Frank standing behind her. Fuck, she hadn't heard him approach.

"I – No," Gee stammered, before saying accusingly, "I thought you said you weren't famous!"

"And I didn't think the perfect girl existed, so we're equal," Frank shrugged, and Gee resisted the urge to pick up a handful of dirt from the ground chuck it at him.

"Yeah, whatever," She scoffed, unzipping her backpack. "I brought a laptop incase you wanted to – "

"Watch porn?" Frank offered, sitting down next to her, and Gee wrinkled her nose at him.

"I was going to say write things down." Gee said, before pausing. "Do you need to go jack it or something? Is that what's going on? Because I can wait."

"No, no," Frank said hurriedly, looking slightly embarrassed. Or, as embarrassed as an arrogant asshole could look. "I'm sorry."

"Alright." Gee snorted, shaking her head as she handed him her phone. "Play some of your stuff, I want to hear it."

She waited a moment as Frank pulled up his most recent album, beginning the first track. Gee nodded her head slightly, pushing her hair back away from her face as she frowned.

"You don't like it," Frank noticed, and Gee shrugged. "Play some of your music." She said, and Frank looked at her, confused. "What? This is my music."

"Play music that you wrote, not what your label told you to."

Frank frowned, but picked up the phone. A few moments later the heavy grating of guitar was playing through the speakers, and Gee grabbed her phone, cranking up the volume.

She leaned her head back, taking in the music. Now this was better.

"I like it," Gee closed her eyes, and Frank glanced at her. "Really?" He said, a half grin on his face.

"Yup," Gee nodded, making Frank laugh. "I guess I wasn't expecting that reaction from a blues camper."

"Who said I liked blues?" Gee asked. Frank threw his hands up in the air. "Uh, the fact that you paid money to be here?"

"I took my brother's spot," Gee said plainly. "He was supposed to come, but couldn't. So, I went instead."

"Well, I guess we both have that in common." Frank said. "My brother definitely would have liked this place more than me." A pause. "You're a rock person, huh?"

Gee grunted. "Eh, more punk, but anything works. I'm more just into music."

"That's chill," Frank agreed, and there was a short moment of silence after the song ended before Gee said, "Put on another one."

They sat there for about half an hour, going through each of Frank's rock songs until he sat up suddenly, and announced, "That was the last one."

Gee nodded slowly. "I can't believe your label doesn't like this."

"Yeah, well," Frank shrugged. "Most people don't."

"Bullshit." Gee said sharply, catching Frank off-guard. "I think people would love it. You're already famous, what's there to lose?"

"There's a lot to lose!" Frank cried. "If I lose my label, I could lose my brother! You don't fucking get it!" He snapped his mouth shut, taking a moment to catch his breath before swiping a hand over his face. "Ugh," He groaned. "I'm sorry, Gee – It's just – "

"It's okay," Gee put a hand on his shoulder before standing up, carefully tilting her waist so Frank couldn't see up her skirt. "I should probably go anyway, it's late. Don't want to get kicked out on my first day."

"Look, Gee. I'm sorry. You won't get kicked out," Frank said quickly, but Gee ignored him, grabbing her bag. "Seriously, Frank, it's fine."

"Wait, wait," Frank leaped to his feet, grabbing Gee's arm. "I'll see you tomorrow, right? Want to meet up, again?"

Gee smiled patiently. "Sure." The truth was yes, she very much did want to meet up again, but right now it was far too awkward and her face was far too flushed.

"Okay," Frank thought for a moment before asking, "At the lake? So we could actually swim, and not sit in a drained pool?"

"You just want to see me in a bathing suit," Gee teased, but her insides had just been washed cold with fear. Shit, that was the one place she didn't want to go with Frank.

"That's definitely a benefit." Frank grinned. "Tomorrow? It's a date?"

"Nope," Gee shifted away from his hand, which was still on her arm, and Frank dropped it awkwardly. "Why not?"

"Can't swim." Gee said plainly, hoping to crush his dreams but only succeeding in making him happier. "Hey, I could teach you!"

Gee was horrified. "Absolutely not. No way." Because no, she could not go to swimming with fucking Frank Iero while she was in a bathing suit, and it would be even worse if he was trying to teach her. His hands would be on her body trying to hold her up and then he would definitely be able to tell –

"C'mon," Frank pleaded, a smile playing on his lips. "It'll be so fun, I promise."

"You giving me lessons on anything is not my idea of fun." Gee said, and Frank rolled his eyes. "Okay," He said, emphasizing the word. "But I will never write another rock song if you don't."

"What?" Gee asked, her face contorted with confusion. "Frank, that makes no fucking sense – "

"It's the truth," Frank said, preparing to walk away. "But you know, it's your choice, Gee."

"Fuck, stop it," Gee pulled his shoulder, forcing him to look at her. "You are literally the biggest asshole I've ever met, you know that?"

"Is that a yes?" Frank asked, raising his brows. "Nine-am? Tomorrow?"

"Yes," Gee forced out. "But it's not going to be a lesson, and I don't have to wear a swimsuit."

"I won't either then." Frank warned, and Gee shrugged, turning to leave. "Good for you."

"You won't get to see my abs!" He called as Gee's disappearing back as she walked away.

"I don't give a shit about nonexistent things." She retorted, laughing to herself once she was out of Frank's hearing range.


	4. Chapter 4

"You never get off your phone, do you?" Ray asked as they ate breakfast. Frank had barely touched his cereal - he'd been too busy trying to find Gee's Instagram. To his great disappointment, she hadn't followed him back yesterday, and he'd been looking through his story views for her face ever since.

"Sorry," Frank grinned sheepishly, glancing up from his phone for a moment before going back to scrolling.

"I bet he's looking for some girl," Lindsey said. She was a friend of Ray's, but Frank hadn't taken notice of her presence at the table until this very moment.

"Guilty." Frank affirmed, and as if on key Jamia slid into the seat next to him.

"Hey, Frank!" Jamia said joyfully, tossing her hair over her shoulder. Frank groaned internally, trying his best not to flinch away. It wasn't that he didn't like Jamia, she was fine, but she really, really liked him. It was her second week at camp, but the two hadn't really interacted the week prior, as Frank mainly stayed secluded in his own bunk. But now that he was in a camper bunk, Frank doubted if she would ever leave him alone.

"Is this her?" Lindsey asked, pointing to Jamia, and Jamia's eyed widened. "Were you talking about me, Frank?"

"Not quite," Frank mumbled, just as Lindsey said, "Yeah, he was looking for a girl."

"That's so sweet of you!" Jamia hugged Frank around his neck, her body pressing against his shoulder. "Yeah," Frank said, awkwardly detaching himself.

Even if he did like Jamia, the two had nothing in common. Jamia was a blues-to-the-core type of girl, and was far too scared to ever touch a skateboard. Gee on the other hand . . . Well, she was scared of swimming. But Frank could definitely picture her at the front of a mosh-pit, or jumping onto a skateboard, even if she couldn't ride it. Things Jamia could never do.

"Met anyone new here, Frank?" Ray asked, trying to save Frank from Jamia's overwhelming presence. Frank grabbed onto it, nodding. "Uh huh, after the show yesterday I – "

"Oh my God, your show was so good!" Jamia squealed. "It was so intense."

"I met a girl." Frank said, and Jamia froze. Lindsey snorted, mouthing cold to him.

"Her name's Gee," Frank said, breaking the silence, and both Lindsey and Jamia inhaled sharply. "What?" Frank asked.

"I don't know, man." Lindsey said. "Gee's in our cabin and she's . . . different."

"She wouldn't even talk to me!" Jamia huffed indignantly. "And she takes like, ten years to get ready in the morning!"

Frank frowned. He hadn't pinned Gee as a girl who cared a lot about her appearance, but he guessed looking that hot couldn't be effortless.

"Oh my God, there she is!" Jamia hissed in his ear as she pointed across the room, and Frank followed her finger to find Gee, walking toward them.

"She's coming over here," Ray said, and Lindsey rolled her eyes dramatically. "No shit, Sherlock."

"Gee!" Frank waved to the girl as she came over, hesitantly taking the seat across from Frank.

"Hey," Gee smiled awkwardly, and everyone greeted her back but Jamia, who stared at her with narrowed eyes.

The table was in silence for a moment before Gee spoke up, pulling out her phone. "What class should I take this morning? I can't decide."

"What are the options?" Frank asked. He'd forgotten to check the camp's workshop schedule for today. There were three blocks a day, running classes you could come in and out of. The rest of the day was free for music.

"Well, Frank and I are going to a dance workshop," Jamia said, making Frank's head snap up. "What the fuck? Jamia, I'm not going to a dance workshop."

"Don't be silly," Jamia laughed as if he'd just said something hilarious, but then continued talking to Gee. "But I don't think those classes are for bigger girls, like you. Does music history sound interesting?"

"I think I'm going to leave, now," Gee said flatly as she furrowed her brows, standing up from the table.

"Jamia, what the fuck?" Frank spat as he pushed back his chair and followed her, catching her at the front doors to the cafeteria.

"Hey, wait up," Frank stopped her, and Gee turned around skeptically. "You didn't tell me you had a girlfriend."

"A girlfriend . . . Jamia?" Frank asked, wrinkling his nose in disgust. "Oh, God. Gee, Jamia is not my girlfriend."

"Really?" She snorted, starting to walk again. Frank followed. "Because most people aren't that clingy to their friends."

"Jamia isn't even my friend, Gee." Frank said as he chased after her, trying to keep up with her quick pace.

"She called me big," Gee frowned, and Frank scoffed. "Gee, are you fucking kidding me?" He stepped in front of her, forcing her eyes to meet his. She walked around him.

"You're tall, but you're sure as fuck not fat." Frank insisted, and Gee shrugged. "I don't need your opinion."

"Gee, I – Ugh, " Frank shook his head. "Jamia's just jealous because she's short and flat – "

"Do you have a problem with girls who are flat, Frank?" Gee cocked her head, and Frank's tongue seemed to get stuck in his mouth as he realized Gee's obvious lack of chest. "I, uh – No, of course I don't."

"Glad to hear," Gee said coldly, and Frank threw his head back. "Gee," He whined. "Come on, don't be like that. You know it's not what I meant."

"Why are you still following me?" Gee asked suddenly. "I barely know you."

"Uh, because you're awesome?" Frank replied. "And cool, and could totally help me with my song?"

"So, this is strictly business?" Gee said. "What could I help you with? The only thing I play is guitar, but it seems like you've got that one covered."

Frank bit his lip as they reached Gee's cabin door. "Vocals?" He tried sheepishly, and Gee turned to him, dumbstruck.

"Vocals?" She repeated. "Are you out of your fucking mind? I can't sing your vocals."

"I'm sure you could," Frank said slyly, but Gee wasn't having it. "Knock it off, Frank." She said. "You're the star – you've got to sing. You know, I really thought you were taking this song thing seriously."

"I am taking it seriously!" Frank clasped his hands together in an overdone plead as Gee walked into her cabin. "Please, Gee? If you come to the studio with me once, I'll never talk to you again if you don't want me to." Frank stepped through the door after her, watching as she pulled off her shoes.

"As temping as that sounds, I'll have to decline." Gee said, beginning to take off her socks.

"Why?" Frank asked, wondering what the fuck she was doing.

"It's nine-am," Gee explained. "And unfortunately I have a date with a very annoying cunt right now."

Frank paused. "Wait, me?" He asked. "I'm the annoying cunt, right?"

"Right," Gee nodded, ushering Frank out of the room. "So, unless you're going to swim in those jeans, you better go change."


	5. Chapter 5

Gee leaned against the door, running her hands through her hair nervously. Fuck, why was this so hard? It wasn't fair that this had to be so stressful. Swimming was normal – Gee deserved to be able to go swimming whenever she liked! Why couldn't she just put on a fucking bikini like every other girl on the planet and make inadvertently sexual jokes to Frank?

Gee reached to open the door, her fingers brushing against the knob before she thought better of it and sat down on her bed with a sigh. One year until she could start HRT. Three years until she could get bottom surgery. Then she'd go swimming every day and no one could fucking stop her.

Taking a deep breath, Gee stood up, marching out the door confidently. Fuck Frank and his fucking flat chest jokes; he probably had a short dick anyway.

Gee looked around as she walked, taking in the atmosphere. It was hot, and the wind was doing nothing but blowing around the hot air. She came across a few people, and smiled at them as she passed. It made her happy to know that every single one of them looked at her and saw a girl.

Gee hoped that everyone in New Jersey would see a girl, too, when she started school in the fall. Gee had lived in New York until she was twelve, and there she'd been known as Gerard. It wasn't until she'd moved to Argentina that she began to introduce herself as Gee.

"What took you so long?" Frank asked when Gee finally reached the lake, and she rolled her eyes. "Why'd you get here so early?"

"I didn't!" Frank protested, running over to the dock. Gee followed. "So, can you just do whatever you want since your grandfather owns this place?"

"You can call him Grandpa," Frank turned his head to give her a lopsided grin. "Every does. And yeah, I'm kind of exempted from all punishment because of him." Frank sat peeled off his T-shirt, standing in his swim trunks.

"Okay, even though you didn't wear a swimsuit," Frank said, motioning towards Gee's band shirt and athletic shorts. "I decided that swimming in anything but swim trunks would be fucking annoying."

"I don't see your abs," Gee pointed out, and Frank leaned over, clenching his stomach. "They're there!" He insisted through grit teeth, and Gee rolled her eyes. "Don't strain yourself."

"Hey, Gee," Frank said suddenly, pointing down. "How deep do you think that water is?"

"Uh, I don't know?" Gee frowned, turning to look at Frank when he suddenly picked her up, saying, "Guess you'll have to find out!" as he threw her in.

Jesus fucking Christ!

The water was cold and shocking as it touched her skin, and it took everything Gee had not to scream. Panic filled her chest for a short moment, before her feet connected to the ground, and Gee stood up, realizing just how shallow the water was.

Gee's head broke the surface and she gasped for air, shoving wet strands of hair out of her face as Frank laughed and jumped in next to her.

"You fucking bastard!" Gee shouted, but she was laughing. "It's not funny!" She shoved Frank backward, and he splashed around dramatically, pretending her push was harder than it was.

"I am literally about to kill you." Gee said, and Frank grinned wolfishly at her. "It would be an honor."

"Oh my God," Gee rolled her eyes. "What do you want from me?" She was beginning to adjust to the water, and it didn't feel as piercingly cold anymore.

"Um, for you to do vocals on my song?" Frank asked, and Gee splashed him. "Besides that."

Frank thought for a moment. "To hook up?"

"No," Gee said, and Frank looked at her. "What? Why?"

"Why the fuck would I?" Gee scoffed, hoping the red on her face could be passed off as a sunburn. Fuck, and she'd thought swimming was the worst thing Frank could propose.

Sex? Are you fucking kidding me?

"Because I'm hot, and you're hot? It wouldn't be that bad, I swear," Frank said, trying to get her to look at him but Gee wouldn't.

"You don't get 'no' as an answer a lot, do you?" Gee asked, and Frank opened and closed his mouth, looking for something to say before stammering, "No."

"Yeah, I didn't think so," Gee pulled herself back up onto the dock, and Frank climbed out nimbly after her. "Gee, wait," He said nervously, following her as they walked down the dock and back to land.

"What?" Gee said, the word coming out much harsher than she'd intended. She glanced over Frank's hurt expression, his body wet and gleaming from the water. Fuck Frank. Fuck Frank and his perfect face, and perfect chest and collarbones and arms and –

Gee forced her eyes away from him, groaning inwardly. It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair that he had to be so attractive. Frank literally existed to tease Gee, to show her all the things that she'd never be able to have. She knew without asking that all of this – whatever they had – would be over in a heartbeat if Frank ever found out who she was born as.

"Are you okay?" Frank asked gently, and Gee realized she must have a pained look on her face and quickly struggle to force it back to normal. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"Gee," Frank said, his eyes shifting from her face to the ground. "Sorry for asking, I – I won't do that again."

"Frank, I – " Gee sighed, sucking in a deep breath. "I'll sing on your new song."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if i ever say anything blatantly offensive or incorrect about being transgender please, please, please let me know!! and if there are any typos, pls hmu.


	6. Chapter 6

Frank couldn't stop himself from staring at Gee as she struggled with the mic, twisting and turning it away from the amps in a lame attempt to get rid of some static. Her thin brows were furrowed, and a tiny sliver of pink tongue was sticking out between her teeth.

"A little help would be nice." Gee said pointedly, and Frank jumped to his feet. "Sorry, I got you," He said, rushing over to fix the mic for her. "There." Their hands brushed for a moment, before Gee pulled hers back awkwardly.

"Okay, are we ready to go?" She asked, and Frank nodded, throwing the guitar strap over his head. The two of them had gone down to the practice rooms after lunch. Gee had decided on the song "Desolation Row" to rehearse. When Frank had told her that Bob Dyan wasn't very punk (and possibly one of the most folk-blues songs out there), Gee had just rolled her eyes, telling him to "Make it punk, then." Which is how Frank ended up playing power chords on the once calm song, trying to make it as "rock" as he could. He turned up the gain as far as it would go, and stepped on some of the practice room's crappy overdrive pedals.

"Think it needs distortion?" Frank joked, and Gee nodded. "Definitely."

"You're crazy," Frank remarked, but stepped on it anyway. He played the first few chords of the song, and Gee shook her head. "Absolutely not," She said. "Way, way faster."

"It's an eleven minute song!" Frank protested, and Gee frowned. "Well, we're obviously not doing the whole thing."

"Obviously," Frank muttered under his breath as he began to play quicker. "Better?"

"Definitely," Gee nodded, walking over to his amp and turning it up.

"Don't fuck with my amp!" Frank shouted, and Gee flipped him off. "I'll do whatever the fuck I want with your amp."

"We're starting on E," Frank threw a pair of earplugs at Gee, and she put them in reluctantly. Frank bounced his knee, nodding his head as he began to play. Gee joined in after a moment, and Frank gaped at her.

Gee's voice was fucking amazing.

It was all rough and high, and had an odd resemblance to Billy Corgan. Frank loved it. They played through the first chorus until Gee stopped, and Frank clamped his hand on the fret board, shaking his head. "Shit, Gee, you've got some lungs!"

"We need a drummer," Gee said flatly, frowning. "It sounds off without one."

Frank paused, before nodding. "Yeah, I guess we do."

"Who do you use for your music?" Gee asked. "Unless you do them in a DAW?"

"No, they're all real, and I do them." Frank said, and the corner of Gee's mouth tugged up. "Right," She said. "I forgot you were rich."

"Famous, yes," Frank said. "But definitely not rich."

"You know, Frank, the more I think about it, the more I can see you as a drummer." Gee tilted her head. "Anger issues? No boundaries? Narcissistic?"

"Okay, I'm going to stop you right there!" Frank cut her off, laughing. "First of all, how are those drummer qualities? Secondly, how am I any of those?"

Gee opened her mouth to continue but Frank began to speak again. "Actually, don't answer that." He said, standing up and heading for the door, guitar slung over his back. "I'll be right back."


	7. Chapter 7

After twenty minutes of sitting alone, Gee was just about ready to call Frank and ask him what the fuck had happened when he stepped back into the room with a tall, unhappy-looking guy beside him. He had blonde hair and a lip ring, and his face made it clear that the only reason he was here was that Frank either bribed or threatened him into coming.

"I got a drummer," Frank grinned, and Gee looked at him skeptically. "You got a drummer," She repeated, and Frank nodded, looking rather pleased with himself.

"You didn't tell me your singer was hot," The blonde guy grumbled, and Frank elbowed him. "Back of the fuck off, Bob. She's taken."

"By who?" Gee asked, before thinking better of it and shaking her head. "Never mind, I don't want to know. But I thought you were a drummer, Frank." Gee said, and Frank agreed. "Well, duh. But I can't play drums and guitar."

"Is this a perk of being famous?" Gee asked, looking down at him through her messy hair. "Getting everything you want? Does anything bad ever happen in your life, Frank?"

"Um, I'd say so," Frank shrugged, the drummer next to him momentarily forgotten. "I've had two of my parents die."

Gee's stomach dropped with guilt and she slapped a hand over her mouth. "Oh, shit, I – "

"Unimportant," Frank waved her away, putting his arm around the blonde guy's shoulder. "Gee, this is Bob. He likes rock, too."

Gee was still frozen in place. Fuck, two of his parents had died? Was Frank an orphan or something?

"Not really," Bob said, but Frank shushed him. "Don't deny it, Bob."

"Okay," Bob said. "So, we're playing 'Desolation Row?'"

"Yeah," Gee forced out, blinking a few times to pull herself back. "But not the version you know."

✰✰✰

Bob was a liar.

Or at least, that was the only conclusion Gee could come to after they'd run through the song a few times. No matter what Bob had said, after hearing his drums Gee knew that he must like rock. No one could play like that without liking rock.

Unfortunately, that also meant that he played as if he were in front of ten thousand people, instead of in a seven-by-ten practice room.

"That sounded fucking sick!" Frank stomped his foot, hyped, as the song finished.

"Can it just be like, a little slower?" Gee asked. "And quieter? And less, uh, smashy?"

"What?" Bob asked, and Frank shrugged. "Gee's using the vocabulary of a toddler."

"Or maybe Bob's just deaf from his own drum playing." Gee muttered under her breath, before adding, "But you're pretty talented, Bob," Gee nodded at the drummer, and Frank yelped. "Um, what about 'you're pretty talented, Frank?' I think I sounded great." He added, and Gee walked over to where he was sitting and put her hands on his shoulders, pressing a quick kiss to the top of his head.

"You're talented too, Frank," She said with amusement as she walked back to the mic stand, making an effort to put an extra swing in her hips. Frank noticed it, cupping his mouth with hands and shouting, "Kiss my mouth, you coward!" after her.

Gee ignored him, wrapping the mic cable around her wrist absentmindedly. "So, where do we go from here? Have you started writing lyrics yet?"

"A few," Frank admitted, and Bob looked at them, confused. "Lyrics for what?"

Frank explained the situation with Patrick and his label, and Bob listened, nodding silently until he was done.

"Need a drummer?" Bob asked.

"Yes," Gee said, at the same moment Frank said, "No."

"I can play drums in the studio," Frank explained, but Gee scoffed. "Yeah, but what about practices? You can't play both at once, or did you grow another pair of arms while I slept?"

"You'd know the answer to that if we'd slept together," Frank pointed out, and Bob looked back and forth between them. "You don't sleep together?" He asked, and Gee rubbed her nose in a lame attempt to hide the heat crawling up her neck.

"No, we're not dating." Gee clarified, and Frank shrugged. "We could be."

"You should be." Bob agreed, and Frank stood up.

"Want to be my girlfriend, Gee?" Frank asked, and Gee rolled her eyes. "This is very off-topic." She groaned. "We should be focusing on our music, and how totally mediocre we sound."

"Oh yeah," Frank nodded enthusiastically. "Showing off our rock skills at a jazz camp – What could go wrong?"

"Shut up," Gee snorted, but she was internally grateful the subject of dating had been dropped. Being around Frank without him knowing about her was one thing – dating him was another.

But fuck, Gee couldn't tell him, not even for the life of her. It would ruin everything, and Frank needed this. Not just for his brother, but for him, too.

"Well," Bob said. "If you're actually interested in the music and not just fucking each other, there's an open stage after dinner."

"We should do it!" Frank said in excitement, but Gee was too fixated on the 'fucking each other' part. Is that what it looked like to other people?

Is that what it looked like to Frank?

She nodded absentmindedly, which Frank took as a yes. "Let's run it again! This time, louder!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this at like 4am in a horse paddock so my braincell count was low


	8. Chapter 8

"Frank, I think I'm going to puke." Gee said, hiding her face in her hands. Frank rubbed her back sympathetically, trying his best to ignore the fact that he could feel her bra strap through the T-shirt she was wearing. Gee had this thing for bulky clothes – Frank didn't think he could ever recall her wearing a tight outfit.

The group onstage was playing joyfully, and Frank smiled a little as he heard the singer began. Those kids were good. They were going on in three songs, and Gee thought it would be easier to get on stage if they were lingering in the back and not trapped in a crowd. Even though Frank agreed, part of him still wished he could be up there, watching the show.

"Ugh," Gee grabbed at Frank for support and he put her arm around his shoulders. "Why don't we sit down?" Frank asked gently, and Gee nodded. They made their way over to a corner in the back, finally collapsing on empty instrument cases.

"Fuck, is she that hammered?" Bob asked, materializing out of the shadows.

"Shit!" Frank jumped, cursing Bob out. "Don't fucking scare me like that!"

"I'm not high," Gee protested weakly, rubbing her temples. "I'll be fine in a few minutes, I swear."

"Acid? Gee, did you just do acid for the first time?" Bob pressed, and Gee threw her hands in the air. "No, Bob! No acid." She folded over, hugging her stomach. "Just kind of nervous."

"Hey, breathe," Frank said calmly. "Are you breathing?"

"No," Gee said sourly. "I photosynthesize."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure those two have no correlation." Bob said, but Frank shushed him.

"Gee, it's going to be fine, alright? You can't even see the crowd onstage." Frank reassured her, as Bob pulled something out of his pocket and handed it to the girl.

"Can I?" Gee asked, and Bob nodded.

"Drugs? Really?" Frank scoffed.

"She obviously needs it," Bob defended himself. "She compared photosynthesis to breathing."

"Stop bullying me," Gee said as she hit it, blowing the white smoke down at her feet before handing it back. "Thanks," She added quietly.

"Okay, how about we don't use chemicals to solve our problems?" Frank said, and Gee and Bob exchanged a glance before Bob broke into a smile.

"I'm Frank, and my mom told me that weed gives you AIDS!" Bob said, in a crude imitation of Frank that made him snort. "Shut the fuck up!" Frank whacked him. "That is not what I sound like!"

"I'm good, I'm good," Gee announced, getting to her feet. "Let's fucking crush this."

✰✰✰

So, they didn't exactly crush it.

First of all, Frank could hear exactly nothing. Unlike every other show he'd played in the past few years, he'd had no monitor speakers, and couldn't hear a single chord on his guitar after Bob's count in.

Secondly, Bob's hi-hat fucking fell over during the second chorus. They had been using the set the previous group had put together, and apparently one of those kids had shit for brains and didn't know how to put together a drum set.

Finally, Gee's voice had cracked at least ten times throughout the song. When they'd walked off the stage (well, Frank and Bob walked. Gee stumbled,) Frank had to hold her up by her waist to keep her from falling over.

The crowd had cheered for them, but Frank could tell the majority were confused by what they had just heard. Frank only had a moment to think about that though, as Gee tripped on her own feet and Frank had to lunge to keep her standing.

"What did you give her?" Frank gasped as Gee fell onto his shoulder and he pushed he back upright. "She barely had a lungful and she's acting like this!"

"Might have been more than a lungful," Bob mumbled, but Frank couldn't hear him over the roar of the crowd. "What?"

"Maybe I let her hit it a few times earlier, too," Bob said, louder. "I didn't think this would happen, though."

"Yeah, you weren't thinking at all!" Frank snapped, anger bubbling up inside him. He knew he was overacting, but that didn't stop him from balling his fists, grabbing Gee by the hand and dragging her toward the door.

What the fuck did Bob this was going to happen? What did he give Gee?

It was probably laced, Frank thought angrily, followed with, I hope she doesn't die.

It was such an abrupt thought that Frank was caught off guard, coughing into his elbow as he pulled Gee through the crowd. Why would Gee die? What was Frank thinking? Of course she'd be fine.

Suddenly Frank and Gee stumbled out of the building, the cold air a sharp contrast to the hot and muggy one inside. Crickets whirred, and a small wind ruffled Frank's hair. Frank paused, taking a few deep breaths and tried to force the tension out of his shoulder. He had almost succeeded when a yell came from behind him.

Frank and Gee turned to see Jamia bounding toward them, wearing a cute dress with dark eyeliner. Maybe it was the lighting, or secondhand smoke from the show, but Frank found himself thinking she looked kind of hot.

"Frank!" Jamia squealed. "That show! You looked so good!"

"Thanks, Jamia," Frank said awkwardly, with Gee clinging to his side.

"Like, your hi-hat fell and everything!" She bounced up and down on her toes. "Why weren't you singing, Frank? I mean, Gee, your voice is beautiful and all but – Gee?"

Gee had sunk to the ground, sitting with her legs crossed and her face in her hands.

"She's uh, having some problems." Frank said apologetically, and Jamia smiled. "Want to come back in? Lindsey has some drinks. We could hang out!"

"I – " Frank shook his head, looking back at Gee. "Sorry, Jamia. I think I should take Gee back."

Jamia's smile faltered. "Yeah, yeah!" She nodded. "Makes total sense. See you later?" She asked, and Frank nodded. "Yeah," He waved as she went back in, picking up Gee's hand and helping her to her feet.

"My head hurts, Frankie," Gee rested her forehead on Frank's back, and Frank picked up her other hand as they walked away from the noise and toward the quiet of the cabins.

"I bet it does," Frank nodded his head, taking in the night sounds. The pulsing of the music was faint now, and the only sound was the chatter of other campers as they smoked behind their cabins.

"This one's yours, right?" Frank pointed to the door, but Gee shook her head. "Do you have a lighter?"

"Not for you, I don't." Frank frowned, but Gee just whined. "Frank, please. It'll help."

"I'd be horribly surprised if it did." Frank said, but found himself sitting down on the steps of Gee's bunk as she dipped inside, coming back out with a pack of cigarettes in her hand.

"Mm, your lighter has lots of colors," Gee murmured before setting the cig between her lip, and cupping her hand around the flame. Once it was burning she handed it back to Frank. "Are you gay?"

"What?" Frank spluttered. "Gee, no!"

"Aww." To Frank's great confusion, Gee looked genuinely disappointed. Frank turned toward her once he'd lit his own smoke, pocketing the lighter. "Why?"

"No reason," Gee shook her head, before reconsidering. "Well, one reason. Or like, many?"

"Are you friend-zoning me?" Frank asked. Sure, he felt a little bit guilty for taking advantage of Gee's weakened mental state, but he was too involved to back out now. "Because I can definitely take a hint, if you are."

"No, no, no," Gee rubbed at her eyes, smudging around the makeup on her face. "Did you know," She began, pausing to cough. White puffs of smoke came out of her mouth, and she clutched at her throat momentarily before dropping it. "That you think you like me, but you actually don't."

"Gee," Frank began, but she put a hand over his mouth, shutting him.

"You don't know me," Gee explained. "You don't know me at all."

"Then tell me!" Frank was beginning to sound exasperated, but Gee just shook her head. "I'm going to sleep, Frankie."

Picking herself up awkwardly, Gee scrambled to her feet, walked back into the cabin. Frank sighed, running his hands through his hair. Fuck, should he follow her?

She'll be fine.

Frank was halfway back to his own bunk when his phone rang. It was Bob.

"Bob, what's up?" Frank asked.

"Frank?" Bob shouted over the roaring noise in the background. "Oh shit, didn't mean to call you. Bye!"

The dial tone was going off in Frank's ear before he could say another word. Frank was just about to pocket the phone when it rang again. Picking it up reluctantly, Frank snapped, "Bob! For God's sake – "

"It's not Bob." His mother's voice came through the phone, and Frank flinched. "Hi, mom. Sorry, I thought you were someone else."

"That's alright," Frank's mom said patiently. "How have you been?"

"Good," Frank hoped he sounded happy on the other end. "What about you, mom? How are you? How's Patrick?"

"Well, he might have a lung donor." She said, and Frank gasped, biting back the curses that were trying to force their way out in his excitement. "For real? That's great news!"

"Yes, but we're not sure if his donor's going to pull through or not. Don't want to get too excited." Frank's mom paused. "Also, Patrick can't get a transplant until he's started that medication I was asking about."

Fuck. "I'll send the money as soon as I get it," Frank promised, suddenly feeling guilty for going out. He should have stayed in his cabin, writing. Maybe Gee was getting in his way more than she was helping.

"Thank you, Frank."


	9. Chapter 9

Gee awoke with a killer headache.

She moaned, sitting up and holding her head. This was totally unfair; she hadn't drunk anything!

"Here," Lindsey walked over from her bed, pressing a few painkillers into Gee's palm and she swallowed them gratefully. "Crazy night?" She asked, and Gee shook her head. "I didn't drink, Lindsey."

"Yeah, getting baked still makes you feel like shit." Lindsey said, and Gee frowned. "No it doesn't," Gee protested as she made her way to the sink, cupping water into her mouth with her hands.

"I'm going to go get food," Lindsey pulled on a sweatshirt and slipped her feet into some sliders. "Want me to bring you anything back?"

"No, thanks." Gee shook her head. She wasn't hungry.

"Suit yourself," Lindsey shrugged, leaving as Gee pulled out her phone, checking her messages. The first was from Frank, telling her to let him know when she wanted to hang out. She'd to that in a minute, once the room stopped spinning.

Gee went back to her messages, but suddenly froze. The note on her screen made her feel like her heart drop had just dropped into her stomach. No way. No fucking way.

"stay away from frank, fag. he only likes real girls."

Her breathing suddenly shaky, Gee checked who it was from.

Unknown number. Obviously.

Gee sighed, leaning back on her bed. She was alone – Lindsey and Jamia were at breakfast – which meant Gee could finally shower. But maybe it was the headache, or the fact that someone here knew her secret, but Gee didn't feel like showering anymore.

Not knowing what else to do, Gee pulled out her phone and began dialing (which took fucking forever because the numbers for international calls are long as fuck). "Bert?"

"Gee!" The voice on the other end shouted. "Why the fuck has it taken you so long to call me?"

"Sorry, sorry," Gee apologized. "It's just that I mainly text these days and – "

"You know I can't text you," Bert said, and Gee snorted. Sure, international text was expensive, but not impossible. Friendship was the worst part of being a third-culture kid, as almost everyone you met would leave the school within a few years. "You have Whatsapp," Gee pointed out, but Bert shushed her. "How's your American camp going?" He asked, and Gee smiled. "It's been fun, Bert."

"Anyone I need to beat up?" Bert asked. "You know, Australia's only ten-thousand miles away."

"No, everyone's nice," Gee replied. "Plus, I met this one guy . . ."

"Oh, Christ, Gee," Bert barked a laugh. "You've been there – How many nights, now? And you're already trying to get in someone's pants?"

"Um, more like the other way around." Gee snorted.

"Ah," Bert agreed. "So, you've fucked him?"

"No! I mean, of course not, Bert." Gee said, before adding. "He doesn't know."

Bert understood immediately. "Gee," He complained. "That's something you tell someone before you start dating."

"Excuse you, I get to decide who fucking knows, and who doesn't." Gee said sharply, too ruffled to correct Bert on the fact that she and Frank were not dating. Bert replied, "Okay, okay! I'm sorry, you're right."

"Ugh," Gee exhaled quickly, her words coming out rushed. "Someone found out, Bert. They told me to 'stay away from Frank' because he only likes real girls or something and I am freaking the fuck out – "

"Slow down." Bert said. "Frank doesn't know, right?"

"I don't think so." Gee shook her head, and Bert nodded. "Alright, that's all that matters. But I think you should tell him, Gee."

Before Gee could say anything else, Bert sat up quickly, shouting "Sorry!" to someone off-camera. "It's almost midnight here, Gee. My brother's yelling at me for keeping him up, I have to go, sorry!" He hung up and Gee groaned, putting her phone in the charger before thinking better of it and texting Frank.

G: Want to meet somewhere??

She would tell him. Soon.


	10. Chapter 10

Songs couldn't be forced out.

Well, they could. And sometimes it was the forced songs that made the charts, but Frank didn't want to risk writing a cheap song, especially not for Patrick. People always seemed to tell if Frank was having fun with a song or not when he recorded it. Frank wanted to make sure this was one of those songs; one of the fun ones.

Groaning, Frank slammed his laptop closed. If he tried to write the bridge one more time he was seriously going to lose it.

Maybe if he just walked away and continued it in ten minutes . . .

As if on cue, Frank's phone chirped and he looked at it expectantly.

G: Want to meet somewhere??

F: you know where to find me x

Frank put his guitar back in the case and shut down the amp, stuffing his laptop back into his bag before heading out of the practice room to the stage. He groped around for a few moments before finding the skateboard he'd left there on the first day of camp, grabbing it and throwing it under one arm.

When Frank went down to the drained pool he found Gee already there. "Hey," He nodded, and she grinned at him. "I didn't know you skateboarded," Gee sounded faintly impressed, and Frank smiled back, throwing his board down and jumping on it.

"Do you?" He asked hopefully as he went around the pool, skating up as high as the board would allow before making a kickturn and going back down.

Gee shrugged. "My friend does, so I've done it once or twice."

"Boyfriend?" Frank asked, only partially serious as he went by.

"No, Frank." Gee shook her head, smiling behind the hair that covered her face. She never brushed that thing, did she?

"Ever had a girlfriend?" Frank asked. Gee bit her lip, and Frank's eyes widened, too focused on her response to care that he'd skidded and fallen off his skateboard. "You totally have!" He exclaimed, jumping to his feet and brushing off his knees.

"I don't like girls, though," Gee said quickly. "And she was in middle school."

"You're, what, a sophomore?" Frank asked. "Your entire life has pretty much been in middle school." He went to sit down next to her, and Gee bumped his shoulder with hers. "So," She said. "Any boyfriends?"

Frank laughed. "You asked me that last night."

"What?" Gee spluttered. "Fuck, sorry, I had no idea – "

"Well, actually, you asked if I was gay." Frank said. "Which I'm not."

"Is that a yes to boyfriends?" Gee asked, and Frank shook his head. "Nope."

"You don't like guys at all?"

Frank narrowed his eyes at Gee, a small smile on his face. "Gee, are you really into threesomes, or something? Why the fuck are you so obsessed with this?"

Gee's face flushed a bright red and she began to cough, shaking her head violently. "No, no, no," She spluttered, shutting her eyes tight. "No threesomes, please."

"Are gay guys your kink?" Frank asked mischievously, and Gee shook her head again, regaining her breath. "No, Jesus Christ, no. Stop it, Frank."

"Oh, so now you're homophobic?"

"No, shut the fuck up!" Gee shoved Frank and he grabbed her arm, causing them to tumble to the ground, Gee on top of Frank. Her face was inches from his, and he could see the golden flecks in her hazel eyes. God, Frank wanted to kiss her right now. He totally could, too. Something inside him screamed "No!" because he knew how that would drive her away. But fuck, how he wanted to.

"Fuck, fuck, my bad." Gee began to get up but Frank held onto her wrist, keeping her there.

"I did that intentionally." He said, and her face got even redder.

"Frank," She pleaded and he let go, letting her scramble back up to a seated position, straightening out her shirt. Frank stayed on the ground, hoping she couldn't see the way his chest was heaving.

"I'm not homophobic," Gee said suddenly, and Frank glanced up at her. "Yeah?"

"My dad's a missionary, and he's just really, really against it. That's all." Gee explained.

"You're Mormon?" Frank asked, but Gee shook her head no. "But he let you date a girl?" He said, and Gee shrugged, aiming her gaze at the ground. "It was different back then."

"Have you dated guys before?" Frank glanced at her slyly, and Gee snorted.

"Are you suggesting that we're dating?"

"I'm just putting it out there, you know." Frank shrugged. "In case you were interested."

Gee sighed. "Well," She answered. "I haven't dated a guy."

"Have you kissed a guy?" Frank sat up, leaning closer to Gee. She shook her head no, and Frank's heart leaped. This was it. This was when he was going to fucking kiss her.

Frank leaned forward and Gee's eyes closed. He could almost feel her hot breath on his mouth when –

The phone rang.

"Shit," Frank mumbled, pulling back awkwardly. "I should probably answer that; it's usually my mom, y'know – "

"It's okay, answer it." Gee said and Frank nodded at her gratefully as he accepted the call.

"Hey, mom," Frank said. "Can I call you back? Right now's kind of a bad time."

"Frank," The voice on the other end was urgent. "The lungs are available for transplant."

"That's great!" Frank said, glancing over at Gee. Why couldn't his mom have called later?

"But unless we can afford Patrick's medicine by tomorrow, they're going to someone else."

"What?" Frank asked. "Why?"

"Because medicine will give him a higher success chance. And if we can't afford this medicine, what else could we not afford in the future?" His mother asked. "It's the hospital's decision."

"I'll have it done." Frank promised suddenly. "The song'll be done by midnight. Patrick is getting his fucking lungs!" Frank hung up before his mom could yell at him for swearing. He threw down his phone, grabbing Gee's face in his hands, and kissing her, hard.

Gee squeaked in his mouth but Frank didn't let go, grabbing her waist and pulling them together. She relaxed into him, and Frank could have sworn he could feel her heart beating against his chest as his hands ran down her back. Gee pulled away a moment later, gasping for breath, and Frank felt a twinge of guilt for being rough with her. "Frank!" Her cheeks were rosy, and her face was bright with a smile. "What the fuck did your mom say to make you do that?"

"We are writing a song right this fucking second," Frank said, standing up and helping Gee to her feet. "And you are singing on it."


	11. Chapter 11

"Play it again," Gee instructed, leaning back in her plastic chair and sipping her Monster. The black can shifted between her hands as she thought. "But this time with more emotion."

"That's as much fucking emotion as I've got!" Frank protested, biting on his pick. "How many more times to you have to hear it before you can sing?"

Gee shrugged, standing up suddenly and bumping Frank away from the mic stand with her hip. Her heart was still beating wildly from the kiss, even after Frank explained the situation with his brother, and how they needed the song done ASAP. It was fucked up how they were doing that to him. "I can sing now."

"You sure you know the words?" Frank asked, before rolling his eyes. "Of course you fucking do, you've made me sing it four hundred times."

"Stop being a bitch," Gee remarked, waving a hand at him. "Start your guitar-y thing."

"Of course," Frank snorted, but began the opening riffs anyway. Gee drew in a deep breath, swallowing a few times before moving her lips up the mic.

She began singing, quietly at first, but slowly increasing her power as the song continued. Sure, it didn't sound great on the first try, but what song does? By the third run-through they had the track fairly tight track, and Frank was standing now, and Gee was more shouting than singing at certain parts, and she kind of liked it.

When they finished, Gee grinned, tucking her hair behind her ear. "What're you going to call it, Frank?" She asked, and Frank shrugged. "'All I Want is Nothing' seems pretty self-explanatory, doesn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess so." Gee nodded thoughtfully, biting her lip. "Do you think we should practice with drums? And bass?"

"Where are we going to find a bassist?" Frank asked, and Gee frowned, checking her phone. "It's about three o'clock, we could probably find someone, right? Use your magical fame-powers."

"Let me call Bob, first." Frank said, and Gee watched as he dialed up the drummer's number and invited him down. "You know who else I should call?" Frank said, more to himself as he called up Ray, asking if he wanted to join them and 'help.'

"What's Ray going to do?" Gee asked, furrowing her brow. "Wait, he plays bass, right?"

"Yeah, and he's a killer producer." Frank said, before pausing. "I think. Either way, none of the studios here are self-recording, so they all require additional help."

Gee nodded, and they played the song a few more times while waiting for the other two to show up. At one point Frank threw down his guitar, yelling, "We fucking rock!"

"Jesus!" Gee yelped, jumping as it hit the ground. "Frank, pick that up!"

Their opinion changed though, when Bob showed up, listening to them play. "Y'all sound like representatives from the deaf school," He commented, and Frank gave him finger guns, saying, "That's offensive."

"It's true," Bob shook his head. "Who's mixing this shit, anyway?"

"Ray," Frank replied instinctively, and Bob sighed with relief. "Fuck, Toro can fix anything. We'll be fine."

"We?" Frank asked, and Bob nodded, adjusting the seat on his kit and doing a few experimental hits with sticks he pulled out of his bag. "I hate practice kits," He groaned, but motioned at Frank anyway. "Okay, let's go."

It sounded better with Bob by a long shot, and Gee found herself focusing less about what she was singing and more on how she was singing it. "You've got some energy, Gee." Bob said as they finished, and Gee looked embarrassed. "Yeah, I get pretty into it."

"It's nothing compared to Frank over here, though," Bob said, glancing over at a sweaty Frank. "This man loses his shit once the song begins."

"Shut your fucking mouth," Frank laughed, swiping a hand over his face. "We should probably migrate over to the recording studio. It's going to take a while to get set up and all."

"How long do you have it reserved for?" Gee asked, and Frank grinned. "As long as I want. I'm famous."

✰✰✰

Ray clapped his hands together after they finished, nodding slightly. "You don't sound like complete shit!" He exclaimed, and Frank shot Bob a look. "I told you so."

"I like it," Ray explained. "It's looking alright."

"You only sound decent because of me!" Bob protested but Ray waved his hands, silencing them. "Frank," He said, pointing at the boy. "You need to be on backing vocals. Bob," Ray frowned, glancing over the kit. "How many microphones do you think you can get by tonight?"

"You mean we're going acoustic?" Bob raised his brows slightly, and Ray shrugged. "We're going all out, aren't we?" He asked, before turning to Frank, who had been trying to set up a secondary microphone. "Crap, don't do that!" Ray flustered, shooing Frank away from the mic. "You're going to get such horrible phase – Is this a ribbon mic? Are you shitting me?"

"No," Frank grumbled as Ray yanked it out of the stand, returning it to the shelf as he scrounged for a different one. "Here," He selected one from the shelf, handing it to Frank.

"Let's do it again," Frank said unenthusiastically, and Gee laughed. "Here we fucking go."

Two hours and a lot of shouting later, they were recording, with Ray behind the glass, shouting instructions over the intercom as he attempted to level Bob's drums. "Slower, Bob! Dumb it down!" Ray's voice ordered and Bob snorted, complying reproachfully.

Gee and Frank were sitting in the corner as they waited for Bob to finish. Mic-ing up the drums had taken an hour and a half alone, and now Ray was almost done putting each one into ProTools.

"Hit your snare again," Ray said, making Frank roll his eyes. "Damn, Ray, don't you ever piss?" He shouted into the microphone over the snare. They'd gotten pizza, but Ray hadn't left the studio once, not even to use the bathroom.

"Fuck, Frank!" Ray yelped. "Don't shout into those, that's fucking loud!"

Bob opened his mouth to scream into the mic, when the soft whirr of static came over the intercom, signaling that Ray had turned it off. "Shit, he's onto me." Bob shook his head, making Gee and Frank laugh.

"Shut up and play," Gee shoved Bob playfully. "Otherwise we're going to be here all week."

"We probably will be anyway, at the rate Toro's going." Bob complained, holding out his hand. "Beer me."

Frank begrudgingly tossed a can into Bob's outstretched hand from the cooler he'd brought about an hour ago. "If you get drunk, I will actually kill you." Frank warned, and Bob nodded stonily. "Dually noted." He said as he cracked it open, downing the contents inside.

"How old are you anyway?" Gee asked Bob, and Frank glanced over at her. "Why do you want to know?"

"Don't be so fucking overprotective," Gee teased, leaning against Frank's shoulder, and Bob answered, "Seventeen."

"Damn, you're older than Frank," Gee said, earning an elbow from the boy.

"You can't hit girls, douche," Bob snapped, continuing to play as he spoke. Although female pronouns felt normal to Gee now, Bob's words still made a small spark of happiness light in her chest. Girls.

"Alright, we're good!" Ray's voice crackled overhead, and Frank threw his head back. "Thank God!"

Ray suddenly disappeared from behind the glass and came into the studio, eyes bright with excitement. "Gee, I want you over here," Ray picked up her mic stand moved it to the corner. "Kind of like, stand between Bob and the mic, okay? It'll prevent a bit of crossover."

Gee nodded, pulling the headphones over her ears. "And Frank, you get the closet." Ray said, hauling Frank's amps into the storage room.

"What?" Frank asked, and Bob barked a harsh laugh. "Gay."

"You just play too loudly," Ray shook his head. "This is a jazz studio, it's not meant for guitars like that. Plus," He added, when Frank still looked slightly outraged. "I'm doubling microphones on your amp, and you're far too close to Gee and Bob to have the amp out here."

Frank rolled his eyes, picking up his pedalboard and following obediently. Bob made an obscene gesture at Gee as Frank walked into the closet, and Gee clapped a hand over to her mouth in an attempt to smother her laugh.

"Okay, we good?" Ray asked, and Bob and Gee gave thumbs up, followed by a muffled "Yes!" from Frank.

"Fuck yeah," Ray nodded, turning to walk about of the room. "Let's go!"


	12. Chapter 12

Frank laced his fingers with Gee's, giggling stupidly as they sat on the edge of the diving board, their feet dangling off the edge. Frank didn't climb up the old board often, but the beer he'd shared with Gee had given him the confidence he'd needed to do it tonight.

Ray and Bob were still recording, but with nothing left to do, Frank and Gee had left, bringing the alcohol with them. "My stomach hurts," Gee complained, and Frank rolled his eyes. "Something always hurts with you." He retorted, his attention mainly focused on not swaying off the edge. It wasn't too far down to the ground, but definitely enough to hurt.

"I think we kind of rocked," Gee said, and Frank ruffled her hair. "I think you're kind of drunk." He replied, and Gee snorted indignantly. "So, you didn't like the song?"

"No, I loved it." Frank said. "I can't wait until it's done." They sat in silence for a moment, the crying of crickets playing loudly throughout the forest. It was pitch black, with the only light coming from the flashlight on Gee's phone. A cool wind brushed up against his neck, and he bit his lip. Was Gee cold, too? Did she want his jacket?

Frank ran his fingers over the fishnets on Gee's legs, showing through her ripped jeans. Gee giggled. "What are you doing?" She asked, and Frank shrugged. The stockings were hot. Gee was hot.

"There's this concert at the end of camp," Frank said quietly, his eyes not meeting Gee's as he stared down at his hands. "Do you want to do it with me? With our song?"

"Our song?" Gee asked, and Frank nodded. "You did half of it, didn't you?"

"Yeah," Gee murmured, her hands moving to Frank's knees as she leaned forward. "I'd love to."

Frank kissed her.

The second time was better than the first by far as Gee took his face in her hands, moving her jaw slowly against Frank's. The warmth of her mouth was inviting, and Frank's hands drifted down to her waist, running over the small of her back. Without thinking, Frank leaned forward, and Gee had to throw out her hands behind her to keep from falling off. "Watch it!" Her eye's widened as she grabbed the edge of the board, leaning dangerously over the ledge.

"Jesus, sorry," Frank gasped, pulling away from her quickly, allowing for Gee to sit up again.

"Let's go down," Gee stumbled to her feet, rocking for a moment before turning and beginning to descend.

Frank scrambled after her, jumping down the last few rungs of the latter and into the empty pool. "Shit, I'm sorry, Gee. I didn't see – " Frank didn't get to finish as Gee latched back onto him, pushing him against the pool wall.

"Fuck," Frank groaned as Gee slid her hands up his shirt. His legs shifted slightly, and he had to hold onto the wall for support. "I guess you weren't lying entirely about having abs," Gee murmured, her words slightly slurred as she made her way down his stomach.

"Yeah," Frank's tongue felt thick as Gee kissed the space below his navel. Her fingers lingered on the zipper of his jeans. "I – Ugh," Frank didn't think he could form a coherent sentence when Gee stood up suddenly, pressing a kiss to his cheek as she pulled down his shirt.

"We shouldn't do this." Gee said, and Frank blinked at her, confused. His skin felt as if it was burning, and his muscles were tight. "Why not?"

"You've had a lot to drink," She murmured, straightening out her clothes as she grabbed Frank's hand, leading him gently out of the pool. Frank stumbled after her, a puzzled at the sudden change. "Did I do something wrong?" He asked, and Gee shook her head, smiling sadly. Or maybe it wasn't sadly, Frank couldn't tell. Everything was a bit blurry.

"I'm saving it for marriage." Gee said, and this time Frank knew she was joking. "Lies," He teased, and Gee giggled, wrapping her arms around his waist as they started walking the path back to camp. Frank hugged her back hesitantly. "I'm sorry," He said suddenly, and Gee looked up at him, eyes wide. "Don't be sorry." She said seriously, and Frank shook his head, looking away.

"I messed something up, didn't I?" Frank said miserably, and Gee stopped him. "No, Frank. You didn't." She said, and Frank believed her.

"Then, why?" Frank asked as they stood, looking from her to the ground and back. "Why can't we do this?"

"I – " Gee chewed on her bottom lip, grabbing Frank's hand, and they began walking again. "I can't, Frank. Not right now."

"Okay," Frank said quietly, and Gee glanced over. "Really?" She asked, and Frank nodded. "Yeah," he said. "I mean, I'm a little drunk right now, but I think it's fine." Frank could see the lights from his cabin now, and he looked at Gee. Her pale skin, her light hair – She was beautiful.

"I love you, Gee," He whispered as they reached his steps, and Gee laughed, rubbing her shoulder against him. "I think you need to take a shower and jerk off." She grinned, making Frank laugh. "Great idea."


	13. Chapter 13

Gee sat at breakfast, her elbows resting on the table as she ate. Frank was still asleep, but his two roommates were here, along with the rest of Gee's bunk. Her head was still pounding a bit, but the hangover wasn't too bad.

"Where were you guys yesterday?" A boy asked Ray, and Gee glanced up, curious as to how he would respond. "Both you and Frank were missing the entire day."

"We were recording," Ray smiled, speaking kindly. "But I'm not sure you would like the song, Ryan."

"You were recording with Frank?" Ryan gaped, and Ray shrugged. "Gee was the one singing."

Jamia raised her brows at this, nudging Gee. "When do I get to hear the song?" She asked, and Gee looked down at her plate. "We might be doing the concert at the end of the week."

Jamia looked pretty today, making Gee feel self-conscious.

"No way!" Ryan said, beaming, adding, "Oh, hey, Frank!" as Frank sat down at their table.

"He's alive!" Lindsey exclaimed sarcastically, making Frank snort.

"I didn't see you coming," Gee said in surprise, and Frank hugged her, his face bright with a smile. "They bought it." He whispered in her ear, and Gee frowned at him, confused. "Bought what?"

"The song!" Frank shook her shoulders slightly, practically jumping up and down in his seat with excitement. "My label bought it. We did it!"

"Holy shit, yes!" Gee shouted, suddenly aware of everyone at the table's eyes on her. "Oops, I'll explain – "

"The only thing I want explained is if you two are an item or not." Bob waved his hand lazily between them. "I mean, Toro and I both saw you leaving together last night, and no one was in your bunk but you, Frank . . ."

"Why was no one in your bunk?" Gee turned to Frank. "Were you okay last night? You shouldn't be that drunk and alone."

"Uh, you were the one who made me alone," Frank pointed out. "But yeah, where were you two?" He asked Ray and Ryan.

"I was recording." Ray held up his hands, and Frank turned to Ryan. "Ryan?"

"I was, um, in the bathroom – " Ryan began, but Lindsey cut him off. "He was boning some kid named Brendon."

"Wait, so Ryan got some, but you didn't?" Bob asked, making Ryan squeak and hide his face. "Lindsey!" He mumbled.

"You're gay?" Frank looked at Ryan, who shrugged, not looking up. Gee stiffened. Was Frank homophobic? He hadn't seemed that way earlier, but the way he was looking at Ryan . . .

"Are you two even dating?" Ray asked Gee and Frank, and Frank shrugged, looking at Gee. "Up to you," He said, and Gee was suddenly hyperaware of Jamia staring at her as she smiled and answered, "Sure, why not?"

"Fuck yeah!" Frank punched the air, leaning down to kiss Gee.

"Gross, heteros." Lindsey rolled her eyes, and Gee laughed.

✰✰✰

Gee had just finished a class when she got the second text.

She was walking to her room to grab her charger when her phone buzzed. Gee honestly should have been expecting it. What did she think; the sender was just going to stop after one message? She felt stupid, really, for assuming that the problem was going to fix itself.

"you can't do the concert with frank."

It was brief and straight-forward, free of insults unlike the previous one. Gee frowned at it, puzzled, before writing back:

G: And what if I do?

There was no reply, and Gee huffed, snatching up her charger before bursting out of her bunk. She walked out without looking, slamming into Jamia, who dropped her phone upon impact.

"Fuck, sorry," Gee bent down to get Jamia's phone for her, but Jamia snatched it back up quickly. "It's fine," Jamia stammered. "It was my fault, really. Sorry, Gee." She scooted past Gee before she could answer, slipping into the bunk.

Oh, shit.

Gee set her jaw, turning and walking off toward her next class. Jamia was holding a phone. A fucking phone, only a few moments after Gee had gotten the text. It was fucking Jamia who was sending the messages; Gee had no doubt in her mind. Who else would care so much about who Frank performed with?

Shouldering open the door to her next class, Gee plopped down next to Ray and Frank, fuming.

"Yikes, what happened?" Ray glanced at Gee, and she shook her head. "Jamia; that's what."

"Jamia?" Frank repeated, and Gee pulled her phone out of her pocket, making sure to delete the original 'Frank only like's real girls' texts before handing it over. "She sent me this," Gee explained, and Ray read it aloud, over Frank's shoulder.

"'You can't do the concert with Frank.'" Ray recited, and Frank frowned, giving Gee her phone back. "She's just being bitchy," Frank said, before motioning to his left. "Speak of the Devil, there's Jamia. I didn't know she was taking a guitar class."

Gee looked up to see Jamia walking in, her eyes scanning the room. "I doubt she is," Gee snorted. "She's probably just trying to get your attention on her."

"Or at least off you," Frank said, and Gee nodded.

"I'm going to confront her about it." Gee said suddenly, and Ray's eyes widened. "Damn, Gee," He exclaimed. "That takes some serious balls."

"You don't even know." Gee muttered, standing up and approaching the other girl. Jamia had begun talking to Lindsey, completely unaware of Gee as she came over. Jamia glanced up as Gee stepped next to her. "Hi, Gee!"

"I know you're the one texting me." Gee said, pleading her voice not to shake. It wasn't that she was nervous, but sometimes her throat acted on its own accord.

Jamia paled, her mouth falling open. "Gee, I – "

"No." Gee stopped her. "I don't care; stop it. I know you like Frank, and I'm sorry it didn't work out the way you wanted." Gee paused, lowering her voice. "But using the fact that I'm tra– blackmailing me, isn't going to change anything."

"It's not me." Jamia stammered, her eyes wide as she took a step back. "Gee, I won't lie; we probably wouldn't get along the best because, you know, Frank. But I don't have anything on you, and I haven't been texting you."

"What?" Gee asked, and Jamia held out her phone. "Look!"

"I believe you," Gee said, but looked down anyway to see the number in Jamia's settings; the one designated to her phone. It didn't match.

"Fuck," Gee hissed, suddenly feeling hot with embarrassment. "Jamia, shit, I'm sorry." How could she have gotten is so wrong? Didn't the facts match up?

If she hadn't before; Jamia probably hated her, now.

"It's alright, Gee," Jamia said, her sympathy present but cautious. "I guess it makes sense for you to think it was me."

"If it's not you," Gee said, hiding her face in her hands. "Then who is it?"

A third voice spoke, the tone cold. "Me."

What?

Gee had forgotten she'd been standing there, and she could feel her mouth go dry as she turned to her left, going face-to-face with Lindsey.

"You?" Gee asked in disbelief, and Lindsey nodded, her face emotionless.

Shit. "So, you're the one who knows I'm – I'm, uh," Gee began, but Lindsey cut her off. "Yes, Gee. I know."

"Know what?" Jamia asked, and Lindsey looked at her with disdain. "Maybe we should have this conversation in private." Lindsey said icily, and Gee nodded, feeling dumb. It was Lindsey?

"Sorry, Jamia," Gee mumbled again as she followed Lindsey out of the classroom to the building's exit. "Where are we going?" Gee asked, and Lindsey turned. "To our cabin. Unless you want to go somewhere else?"

"No, that's fine." Gee said awkwardly. It felt weird to talk to Lindsey so normally after finding out that she knew everything.

Lindsey knew, but didn't tell anyone, Gee thought, before reminding herself, Well, you hope she didn't tell. She might have.

They walked into the cabin together, Gee sitting uncomfortably on her bed as Lindsey sat on hers. The two girls were across from each other, and Gee looked at the floor, unable to meet Lindsey's eyes.

"Are you upset?" Lindsey asked, and Gee coughed, flustered. "Um, yeah. A little." Gee paused, swinging her feet. It was a bit too hot inside, and if Gee had been alone she would have changed into something more comfortable. "How did you find out?"

Lindsey paused, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "It wasn't hard, Gee. Your Instagram made it pretty obvious." When Gee shot her a questioning look – because all her Insta photos were of Gee, not Gerard – Lindsey began to explain. "I looked at Frank's followers, and found you. Then when your posts had no dirt on you, I looked at your friends; for stuff you were tagged in, right? And I found this one person they were all following: 'gerard.aw.'"

Gee flinched. That was her dead name: Gerard Arthur Way.

"And there was you." Lindsey said, taking a moment before continuing. "Except, it wasn't you. I thought you had a twin, at first. But then I messaged your brother – "

"You talked to Mikey?" Gee gaped. Gee knew Mikey; he'd never answer to some random girl, especially if they asked about Gee. "That's a lie."

Lindsey shook her head. "I just asked what it was like having twins for siblings. And he said something like, 'Um, I wouldn't know?'"

Gee sighed, leaning her chin on her hands. Yeah, that sounded like Mikey. "Are you going to tell Frank?" She asked quietly, and Lindsey shrugged. "I'm not sure, Gee."

"Why?" Gee asked, horrified. "What reason is there to tell him? Who would that help?"

"Three people, actually." Lindsey answered. "Frank, his mother, and his brother."

"But I helped them!" Gee protested. "This makes no sense; we wrote a single for Patrick! I'm helping them!"

"Who sung, though?" Lindsey said. "Not Frank."

"Lindsey, I don't understand – "

"You're taking his money!" Lindsey snapped, hitting her leg with one hand. "Sure, you wrote the song so Frank could have some cash. But who's getting more? You, or Frank?"

"I didn't do it for money! He can have all the fucking money; I don't care!" Gee flushed, outraged. "Dammit, Lindsey, where is this even going? What does this have to do with anything?"

"Patrick's dying, Gee!" Lindsey cried. "He needs Frank's money to live, and you're taking it away! You're distracting Frank!"

"What?" Gee asked, now entirely confused. "Why the fuck do you care so much about Patrick?" She stopped abruptly as realization hit her. "Shit," Gee breathed, shaking her head. "You're dating Patrick."

Lindsey nodded slowly. "Ever since Frank met you, he's been so distracted. Patrick's getting worse, Gee, and we all know Frank's going to break up with you once he finds out your trans."

Gee jumped to her feet angrily. "That's – That's not true!" She spat, eyes wide. "He wouldn't!"

"We'll see." Lindsey shrugged. "Jamia's going to tell him now, so we're going to find out which one of us is right." She said calmly, but each of her words felt like a stab to Gee's chest.

"Why?" Gee's voice cracked, and she wanted to scream. Or cry. Or do both at once, and maybe accidentally throw Lindsey out of a plane while she was at it. "You don't have to do this."

"It was going to happen eventually." Lindsey looked up at Gee. "But the sooner the better for everyone. Patrick can get treatment, and Frank will know the truth. He deserves to know, doesn't he?"

"Don't be like that," Gee pleaded. "Lindsey, please."

"It's time for lunch." Lindsey glanced down at her phone. "I think I'm going to go eat." She stood up, leaving Gee alone.

Gee sat down on her bed, burying her face in her hands as the door banged shut. She should have never come to this fucking camp. She should have never come out as trans. If she had just been a guy, maybe she and Frank could have just been friends. Or maybe she would have never been asked to leave her old school, and everyone would have treated her like the normal boy she was.

She was crying now, but Gee barely noticed as she squeezed her eyes shut, pulling her knees up to her chest.

It wasn't fair. It wasn't fucking fair how everyone else got the right body, except Gee. Fuck God – or whoever was above – for fucking up and making her; the world's biggest mistake.

And then Gee did the worst thing possible.

She picked up her phone and called Frank.


	14. Chapter 14

Frank paced back and forth in the pool.

He was nervous. Too nervous to skateboard, even. The board remained stationary on the ground, flipped on it's back.

Like Patrick is now, Frank thought, wringing his hands.

He was in surgery. With the promise of money, they'd been able to operate on Patrick. Frank's mom had told him there was an eighty-percent chance of survival, and now the phrase repeated itself over and over in his head as he walked.

Eight-percent the first year, and then it went down with every coming year. By the fifth year, it would be at fifty-percent, and with the sixth . . .

Frank shook his head, as if trying to shake the bad thoughts out. Patrick would be fine – he always was. Cystic fibrosis wasn't about outliving the disease; it was about living long enough for someone to find the cure.

L: where r u?

Frank's phone buzzed, and he typed back shakily:

F: I'm fine, don't worry.

He hadn't seen anyone since halfway through the guitar class, when his mom had texted him to, 'Call her now!'

L: do you want to talk? Im kind of freaking out too

Frank frowned, shutting off his phone. He wasn't freaking out! He was more than freaking out! A lung transplant was the most dangerous thing Patrick had ever done by far, and Frank felt as if he was about to have a fucking aneurysm!

His phone rang, and Frank was preparing to scream at Lindsey when he saw the name. Gee.

Frank paused. Could he really talk to Gee right now? He supposed she deserved an explanation of where he went, and if anyone could make him feel better, it was her.

"Hey," Frank answered, his voice breaking a bit at the end. Shit.

There was silence on the other end, and Frank wondered if she'd misdialed. "Hello?" He asked, and her soft voice answered. "Yeah, hi."

Frank sighed as they sat in silence. "Gee, is there something you want to talk about? Because I'm kind of having a hard time right now."

"I know, and I'm really fucking sorry." Gee said, her words rushing out. "I really didn't mean for it to happen, I just didn't think things would get this far so I didn't want to tell you – "

"What?" Frank asked. "Gee, this has nothing to do with you! What are you talking about?"

A pause. "W-What do you think I'm talking about?"

"Patrick." Frank answered. "He's getting a lung transplant? I thought Lindsey would have told you."

"Lindsey and I aren't – " Gee cut herself off. "No, she didn't tell me."

"Alright," Frank rubbed at his eyes with one hand, holding the phone with his other. "Well, he's getting one right now. And I'm kind of losing my shit."

"Well, yeah. Understandably," Gee said. It sounded like her voice was shaking (maybe crying?), but Frank blamed bad reception. After all, he was in the middle of the woods. "Are you in your bunk?" Gee asked. "I'll come over."

"No," Frank said, and Gee snorted. "Right, of course not."

✰✰✰

Frank had composed himself by the time Gee arrived, sitting up and waving to her. His heart gave a little flutter as she smiled at him, and Frank cursed it out silently. Now wasn't the fucking time. Gee didn't increase her pace at all as she saw him, continuing to walk over to where he was sitting.

"You feeling okay?" She asked, sitting next to him, and Frank shrugged. "Doing better. I won't get surgery updates for another few hours, though."

"It'll be okay." Gee said calmly, surprising Frank. They sat there for a moment, before Gee asked, "Did Jamia or Lindsey, um, say anything to you?"

"No," Frank said slowly. "Why?"

"No reason." Gee said, but Frank knew she was lying.

Silence fell upon them. Gee sniffing was the only sound, and when Frank asked if she was okay, she blamed her allergies.

"Can we just talk?" Frank pleaded, hoping he didn't sound needy. "I'm not sure why we're so awkward right now, and I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but I'm really stressed and like, sitting in silence isn't helping – "

Gee kissed him.

It was short and only for a moment, but long enough to shut Frank up. He could tell the moment she pulled away that she regretted it, her eyes filled with guilt as she looked at the ground.

"Gee, I'm sorry." Frank apologized suddenly. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No." Gee shook her head, smiling sadly. "You didn't do anything wrong, Frank. Don't worry."

And then she began talking about music, and artists, and Frank got lost in the world of punk bands as they argued and laughed. Before he knew it the sun was setting, and Gee stretched, closing her eyes. Her shirt pulled tight across her body as she leaned back, and Frank forced himself to look away before he got caught staring. God, she was hot.

"We should probably go back." She said tiredly, getting to her feet and Frank followed. "To my bunk?" He asked, and Gee nodded. "I'm not staying with you, though," She warned, and Frank put his hands up innocently. "I wouldn't dream of doing anything else."

"You definitely would," Gee snorted, before shooting him a sidelong glance. "Was that a pun? You know, sleep, dream – "

"Shut up, it was not," Frank joked, wrapping one arm around her as they walked. Gee stiffed a little under his touch, but didn't pull away.

"Thank you, Gee," He said after a moment, and she looked at him. "For what?"

Frank shrugged. "Just being you."

Gee was silent for a long moment, making Frank become worried. "Is something wrong?"

"It's just – " Gee huffed, moving out of Frank's reach. Frank's arm fell to his side awkwardly, and he gave her the space she wanted as they reached the end of the trail.

"I'm being me, Frank." Gee motioned toward herself. "This is the most me I've ever been. I'm being this because this is me, not – not what I could also be." She sighed, rubbing her face in distress. "You don't get it, do you?"

"Not at all." Frank answered honestly, and Gee shook her head. "Just forget it. I shouldn't have said that, I'm sorry."

They were almost back at Frank's bunk by now, but Frank didn't want her to go. "Wait," Frank said as they reached the door, Gee's hand on the knob.

"There's a lounge behind the stage. It has couches and stuff – "

"I'm not fucking you!" Gee shot, before he could finish, and Frank shushed her. "Jesus Christ, I wasn't asking you to!" He cried. "I was saying we could stay there – on separate couches," Frank added loudly when Gee shot him a look. "And be away from everyone else? Please? I really don't want to deal with Ray and Ryan right now."

"Deal with them?" Gee asked. "I thought they were nice."

Frank huffed. "Yeah, they are. But I'd have to pretend to be fine around them, and I don't think I can handle that right now. I just want to act normal, Gee." He pleaded. Gee groaned, muttering, "Boys and their fragile masculinity," As she grabbed his arm, dragging him back away from the door. "Alright, where's the lounge?"

It was above the stage, in the attic of the building. There were a few windows near the top, and a thin layer of dust covered the rafters above them. The room was only used every now and then before shows, but most people only stayed up here for a few minutes before running back down. After all, who wouldn't want to watch the people before them performing?

"We're staying here?" Gee asked as she climbed the last step, pushing the trap door shut behind her. Frank nodded. "Yeah. Too dirty for you?"

"There's no bathroom," Gee observed, and Frank snorted. "Just piss out the window . . . Oh, wait." He realized. "You're a girl, shit."

"No, I can do that." Gee said suddenly, catching Frank off-guard. "What?"

"Yeah, I can. Frank, can we talk about something?" She asked, and Frank nodded, sitting down. "Sure."

Gee squirmed in her seat and Frank frowned. "Gee, you've been acting weird all night." Frank said, and Gee looked away. "If Jamia or Lindsey try to talk to you tonight, please ignore them." She said quietly, and Frank scooted closer to her.

"Gee, I'm not going to believe any shit they're trying to spread about you, alright?" Frank nudged her shoulder, but Gee didn't lean back.

"They're trying to tell you the truth, Frank."

Frank paused, tilting his head. "The truth about what? Are you dating someone, Gee? Did you hook up with someone else? Wait, are you a lesbian?"

"Can you forget about sex for once?" Gee cried, her voice choked. Frank snapped his mouth closed, eyes wide. "Gee – "

"I can't have sex with you!" Gee's eyes shut, and she grabbed a fistful of her hair. "I can't, so just fucking drop it!"

Frank was quiet, watching Gee's figure in the dim lighting. It was night now, and no one else was awake. His breath seemed to stay caught in his throat. How did he fuck everything up so bad?

"I'm so, so sorry, Gee." Frank said, his voice barely above a whisper. Gee shifted in her seat, not opening her eyes. Frank reached forward to comfort her but then stopped midway, pulling back. "Shit – Should I not touch you, or – "

"I wasn't fucking raped, Frank." Gee spat, and now Frank was the upset one, flinching away from her. "Then what's wrong?" He asked, a little exasperated. "I can't read minds, you know! And when you start acting like this I just thought . . . "

"Do you know what transgender means, Frank?"

"Sure." Frank said. He'd heard of it before. "It's when you decide to dress in drag, but like, forever." A pause. "Gee, what does this have to do with anything?"

"It's not that," Gee began, when suddenly the trapdoor flew open – Frank could have sworn Gee locked it – and Lindsey burst in. "Frank!" She yelled, and Frank jumped, almost falling back off his seat. "Why won't you answer your phone?"

"My phone?" Frank asked, pulling it out. It was on silent, and Frank's stomach dropped when he turned it on. Thirty missed notifications.

"Is Patrick . . ?" Frank forced the words out, his throat feeling sick.

"We've been looking for you everywhere!" Lindsey cried, and Frank could now see a couple of other people behind her.

"Patrick," Gee pushed past Frank, who was at an obvious loss for words. "Is he okay?"

Frank looked at Gee gratefully as Lindsey shook her head. Frank could see that she was crying now, and it made a tight knot form in his stomach. He felt like vomiting as they climbed down the ladder into the backstage area. Grandpa was there, along with Brian and Ray.

"It's bad, Frank." Lindsey shook her head, twisting her hands. "It went wrong and he's not okay."

"Wait, how does she know?" Brian asked, and Gee spoke up, "Patrick's her boyfriend."

Frank glanced at Lindsey in surprise, and she glared at him through teary eyes. "I go to your school, dumbass."

In Frank's defense, like five-thousand kids went to his high school. "I'm calling my mom," Frank fumbled with his phone, but Gee put her hand on his arm lightly. "Frank, she's probably really, really busy right now."

Grandpa nodded in agreement. "I spoke with her earlier. Call her in the morning, okay?" His voice was steady and caring, and it calmed Frank down a little.

"I think I'm going to puke," Frank mumbled, barely aware of Ray as he grabbed his hand, leading him out to the bushes in front. The hall lights began to blur above Frank, and he closed his eyes.

"Ray, I can't do it here." Frank barely got the words out before he threw up, doubling in half and clutching at his stomach. Frank's throat burned from the acid as his stomach heaved a few more times before Frank sat up clumsily, wiping at his mouth.

"Nice," He mumbled, and Ray gave him a sympathetic smile. "Anything I can do?"

"I – I think I need to sit." Frank made his way ungracefully to the ground and Ray joined him. The grass pricked at his limbs, and Frank groaned. He felt sick.

"We probably shouldn't stay out here for too long," Ray said, and yet somehow they still managed to spend at least another half-hour sitting, with Frank making the occasional leap to his feet so he could puke in the bushes.

"Got it all out?" Ray asked when a solid five minutes had passed, and Frank nodded. "I think so."

"Let's go back to the cabin," Ray said when Frank began heading back toward the performance building. "But Gee – "

"Is already asleep because it's very late, and you should be too." Ray finished for him. When they reached the cabin Frank was feeling tired, but he glanced up in confusion when Ray turned to go.

"I'm staying somewhere else," He explained. "Everyone agreed that you might want the night to yourself."

"Yeah, okay." Frank nodded, because whatever, as he closed the door, barely taking the time to kick off his shoes as he got in bed.


	15. Chapter 15

Gee awoke to the sounds of whispering.

"You didn't tell him?" It was Lindsey. "What do you mean, you didn't tell him?"

She shifted slightly so she could hear better, still trying her best to look asleep. Was Lindsey talking about Frank?

"I couldn't find him!" Jamia squeaked back. "I looked everywhere, I swear! Jesus, Lindsey, I really don't want to do this to Frank. Didn't you hear about his brother's surgery? The last thing he needs to hear is that his girlfriend is a fag!"

"Nothing happened to his fucking brother." Lindsey hissed, and Gee froze, holding her breath.

"W-What?" Jamia stammered. "But Ray said – "

"Yeah, well I lied to Ray." Lindsey said. "I lied to everyone, the surgery went fine. But Frank's going to find that out soon. You need to tell him that Gee's actually Gerard so he can break up with her – him, whatever – while he's still upset. Otherwise, who knows what he'll do."

"Why now, though?" Jamia asked. "Lindsey, I don't really get it. Couldn't we just leave Gee – uh, Gerard," She added when Lindsey snorted. "Alone?"

"But Jamia," Lindsey cooed. "You're the one Frank should be dating. Don't you think?"

Gee wanted to punch this fake bitch in the face.

"I-I guess," Jamia said quietly. "I just think this is all going to make Frank really, really sad, and I love him but – "

Gee sat up. She couldn't stop herself, not even putting in the effort to make it seem like she'd just awoken. Lindsey spun to face her, but it was too late, Gee was storming over, because fuck messy hair or morning breath, she was about to do this bitch in –

"Gee, wait!" Jamia yelped – and maybe it was because she didn't actually want to hit Lindsey, or because Jamia had used her real name – but Gee stopped. "What the fuck is wrong with you all? Why would you lie to Frank?" Gee fumed.

"You've lied to him from the start!" Lindsey cried. "At least I'm trying to help someone other than myself!"

"By hurting two other people?" Gee asked, and Lindsey scoffed. "Like you weren't going to hurt him anyway, once you told him what you really are. What did you think he was going to do when he found out you were a guy? Marry you?"

"I'm not a guy!" Gee almost screamed, when suddenly Jamia spoke up. "Lindsey, we can't do this. We can't. It's wrong."

"What's wrong is dressing up as a girl to trick people!" Lindsey leaped to her feet, marching toward the door. "You know, I was trying to help you, Jamia. You and Frank could have been a thing – but if you're such a pussy, then I'll tell him myself!

"Lindsey, stop it," Jamia said quietly as Lindsey slammed the door. Gee got up to follow, her fingers stopping at the doorknob as she rattled it. "It's locked." Gee said. "Fuck, that bitch locked us in here!"

"I'm sorry, Gee." Jamia said as Gee groaned, walking over to her bed. Who the fuck made camp doors lockable? "I don't know when Lindsey became so . . ." Her voice hitched and Gee glanced over.

"Lindsey's dating Frank's brother." Gee explained, furrowing her brow. "He has cystic fibrosis, and he needs Frank's money. I'm sort of fucking that up, though."

"Oh," Jamia said, and Gee shrugged.

"I thought she was a lesbian, too."

Jamia laughed a little, sniffling. "No, Lindsey's bi. I was surprised because she's doing all this for her boyfriend, and like, would I do that for Frank? Would I lie to people and make them cry?"

"Frank's not your boyfriend." Gee said, and Jamia frowned. "Yeah, well he might not be yours anymore, either."

Gee sighed, throwing back her head in defeat. "Fuck."

There was silence for a moment before Jamia asked, "How did you hide it so well? You really look like a girl. Without Lindsey telling me, I'd never have been able to tell that you're a guy – "

"I'm not actually a guy." Gee scowled. "And you weren't supposed to be able to tell. That's kind of the point. Being trans isn't a party trick, Jamia." And yeah, in Gee's opinion, she did pass. But that didn't stop the small Adam's apple in her throat, the sharp jawline, or the prominent veins in her arms from existing. Most cis people didn't know to look for them, but Gee didn't care. She knew they were there, and that was all that mattered.

There was her dick, too, but Gee really didn't like thinking about that one. It would be gone one day, and that was enough for Gee as far as she was concerned. The loose pants and long shirts could hide it for now (because tucking was too much work to do every day), but even thinking about surgery made Gee shiver. They'd probably give her shots, with needles, and it would be so, so worth it but also terrifying.

"But you're like," Jamia bit her lip, looking away. "You really don't look transgender."

"Yeah, well long live puberty blockers, am I right?" Gee shrugged. "And thank God for accepting parents who let me use them."

"I'm sorry," Jamia said, and Gee could tell Jamia didn't know why she was apologizing but she accepted it anyway. "Thank you."

Suddenly the door opened, and there was Ray. "Hey!" He waved. "Your whole cabin wasn't at breakfast, and I was starting to get worried. Wait, where's Lindsey?"

"Ray!" Jamia ran over and hugged him. Ray stumbled back a few steps, looking surprised. "Oh! Hi, Jamia." He laughed awkwardly. "What's going on?"

Gee sighed. "Okay, well, Lindsey locked us in here, but I guess it's unlocked from the outside. And since the whole camp is going to know soon; I'm trans." Gee braced herself for Ray's reaction, but he just raised his brows, smiling. "She–her pronouns, right?" Ray asked, and Gee nodded hesitantly. "Yeah."

"Got it." He smiled, and Jamia looked at him uncertainly. "You're okay with it?"

Ray shrugged. "I don't see why I shouldn't be. If Gee's a girl, she's a girl."

"But she's not a girl." Jamia protested, and Gee rolled her eyes, getting off her bed and loudly announcing that she was going to get dressed. Once she walked out of the bathroom (in a short shirt and long pants, which, despite its simplicity was possible the hardest outfit choice of her life due to the circumstances) Ray suggested they go to breakfast. Jamia walked ahead as they neared the building, and Ray fell back to be closer to Gee, who was possibly wearing a little more makeup and jewelry than normal. If looking like she just walked out of a Tumblr "grunge starter pack" post was what it took, then it was what Gee was going to do.

"Jamia will get it with time." Ray promised, and Gee sighed. "I doubt it." She said, before adding, "I don't really care if she does, though. I'll never see anyone here again after today."

"Wow," Ray breathed. "I can't believe camp's that close to ending."

"I can believe it." Gee scoffed, and Ray nudged her. "Hey, you're going to see Frank again, aren't you?" He paused. "You know, Frank seems kind homophobic sometimes. I guess he's not transphobic, though."

"He didn't know about me, but he does now. Lindsey's telling him." Gee shook her head. "Why are you being so nice to me, Ray?"

"What reason is there not to be?" Ray asked, grinning.

"You should just go hang out with everyone else." Gee said. "I'm sure they'll give you a few reasons."

"Gee," Ray said, sounding slightly exasperated before adding, "Okay, I have two dads, if you really want to know."

"Ah," Gee nodded as they walked into the cafeteria. "So, you're an ally, by law." Of course, Frank wasn't in here, but that didn't stop Gee from looking around for him.

"No, I could totally be mean if I wanted." Ray said, but Gee wasn't paying attention, because someone had just said it. Someone had said it right behind her and now she couldn't move because how the fuck had Lindsey told everyone so quickly and –

Gerard.

The word was clear now, and Gee could hear he and him pronouns being used as people talked about her. People were looking – everyone was looking.

"Alright, maybe this was a bad idea," Ray turned Gee around and they walked out of the cafeteria and back toward the woods. Her face was hot and Gee clenched and unclenched her fists, hiding her face as they passed people.

"Why do they all know?" Gee hissed as they walked, not caring as they passed her cabin. "Why do people care so fucking much?"

"You were dating Frank Iero." Ray pointed out. "Everyone knows who you are."

Gee realized she was going toward the pool, but Ray didn't question it as they kept walking into the woods. No one else was out here but them.

"It'll be okay, Gee." Ray said, and Gee glanced over at him. "Do you mind if I go alone?" She asked. "I just need some space."

"You're not going to do something you regret, are you?" Ray asked skeptically, but Gee shook her head. "No, Ray. I'll be fine."

"If you say so," Ray nodded, before turning and walking back.


	16. Chapter 16

And now we're back to the beginning; where Frank is laying in bed, pillow over his head as he tried not to scream.

Crying was probably more appropriate in this situation, but he was so emotionally exhausted that Frank didn't feel like he could cry. Especially not with Lindsey standing next to him, anyway.

Frank cursed at himself repeatedly for not putting the pieces together on his own. How had he not figured it out? Not wanting to go swimming, being so against sex, asking if he was gay –

None of this was real. None of it fucking existed.

Frank hadn't believed Lindsey at first. Gee? A guy? What a joke. Gee, with her full lips and small waist – and bold personality – Gee was a girl.

But there was no arguing with the evidence. That was Gee in those photos, Gee Way – except she wasn't Gee she was Gerard, and Gerard was definitely not female. And Lindsey had shown him Gee's brother's text that he only had one sibling, and not two – fuck.

"I can't believe he lied to us." Lindsey said, making Frank take the pillow off his face. "It's just so wrong."

"I need to talk to her." Frank said, sitting up.

"You mean him," Lindsey corrected. "He's in my bunk."

Frank nodded, standing up and throwing on a shirt before following Lindsey out the door. He hadn't exactly been planning on leaving his room after everything that happened with Patrick, so Frank was a bit of a mess.

But when Lindsey opened the door to her cabin she gasped, as if she couldn't believe her eyes. "They're – They're not in here!"

"What?" Frank asked, before sighing. "Yeah, Gee probably went to get breakfast."

"No, I locked it!" Lindsey said, shaking her head, and Frank spun to face her. "You locked people in here? Lindsey, what the fuck?"

"I'm on your side!" Lindsey defended herself. "I just thought maybe he'd try and run away – "

"Stop saying he!" Frank didn't know why he was so angry – in fact, he hadn't even realized how worked up he'd gotten until he began shouting. Calling Gee a 'he' just didn't fit. She wasn't a he.

"But Gerard is – "

"I'll find her myself," Frank snapped, turning and stalking off toward the woods. No, Gee hadn't gone to breakfast. Especially if she'd known what Lindsey was going to do. Gee was at the pool.

✰✰✰

Frank's breath caught in his throat when he saw Gee. She was sitting on the pool's edge, feet dangling over, hair falling in her face. Fuck, she was so pretty, but she was also a guy.

Frank stepped out into the open, making Gee's head snap up as she jumped in surprise. Frank could now see her face clearly, and it was obvious she'd been crying.

"Where's the bear?" Frank asked, and Gee tilted her head at him, confused. "What?"

"You look terrified," Frank pointed out. "So, there has to be one."

Gee huffed, smiling. "Stop stealing my jokes," She snorted, before sighing and looking away. "Why are you even here?"

"Because I like you." Frank smiled, walking over to sit across from Gee in the pool so that he was looking up at her. "I don't get it, though. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why do you think?" Gee swung her feet back and forth, playing with the edge of her shirt. Frank thought it looked nice on her. "You wouldn't see a cute girl; you'd see a freak."

"You're not a freak," Frank said pointedly, standing up and grabbing her hands. Gee pulled away, blinking hard.

"Go away, Frank."

"I'm not going anywhere." Frank said, his hands falling to his sides. He paused, staying silent for a moment before asking, "Are you mad at me?"

"No." Gee shook her head. "Just sad."

"Why?" Frank asked, and Gee looked at him. "Isn't it obvious?" She asked. "I'm sad that I'm not a girl. Then we could have dated, and actually hooked up, and we would have been so normal – "

"You are such a girl." Frank sat next to her, putting an arm over Gee's shoulders and pulling her close. Gee sighed, her back shuddering under Frank.

"You know, this helps my ego a lot." Frank nudged her. "I thought you wouldn't fuck me because I was ugly or something. And in case you were wondering, I have a long dick."

"I bet mine's longer," Gee snorted, before shutting her eyes and groaning. "That was definitely the wrong response." She muttered, and Frank shifted slightly.

"That's just weird to think about," He admitted. "Like, I really can't imagine it."

"Yeah, don't," Gee nodded. Suddenly Frank raised a brow at her, and Gee turned to face him. "What?"

"Have you ever jacked off to me?"

"Frank!" Gee cried, shoving him away. Frank caught himself before he fell, laughing hard. "Oh my God," He said between breaths. "That's such a yes."

"You are literally the worst person I have ever met!" Gee huffed, her face flushed face bright red.

"I used to wonder if people jerked off to me," Frank said. "But I never imagined one of them to be my girlfriend."

"So, you imagine dudes jerking off in your free time?" Gee asked, and Frank kicked some leaves at her. They fell short by a mile. "No!"

Gee was the one laughing now, and Frank grabbed her hands. "Shut up!" He kissed her, and Frank felt her teeth on his lips as she grinned before pulling away as Gee broke into another fit of laughter.

"Are we still doing the concert tonight?" Frank asked, tucking a strand of hair behind Gee's ear. Gee turned to face him, her eyes bright and happy as she smiled.


	17. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you liked where the story ended, don't continue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These were the FAQs from where I originally posted the fic.

1\. DID FRANK GET ALL PUNK N SHIT AFTER THE CAMP OR NAH

yes ofc and he makes edgy as fuck music with gee.

2\. what's up with patrick did his surgery turn out well or

well lindsey lied about it going bad but yes it went fine. lung transplants aren't permanent solutions for cf and only last 5-10 years.

3\. whats the deal between gee n frank did they continue dating or broke up bc of distance or whatever

they broke up. but maybe they're still friends iDK

4\. IS PATRICK OK?

cystic fibrosis is a terminal disease, so unfortunately no rip patrick

5\. Please don't end thisss

i mEAN i can do an epilogue but wHAT elSe wOULD I ADD THO 

6\. DID LINDSEY AND JAMIA GET SLAPPED

yes. patrick yeets over, slaps them both, discovers that slapping bitches is the cure for cf and is healed forever !!

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this back in august of 2019, when i was going through a tough time. i'm currently eating a rubber band, so its up to you to decide whether things have gotten any better.


End file.
